Tiny Frog ||Stucky Fanfiction|| (DISCONTINUED)

25

(Fun fact this story has been around for almost two whole years ain't that nutty)

(Steve POV) 

I wait for Tony to leave before delving further into my discovery from earlier. I approach Bucky, who is now very much more alert, but still not quite himself.

"Soldier?" I ask tentatively, not wanting to provoke him and standing six feet away for good measure. "I am talking to the Winter Soldier, right?"

He gives a short nod and gets up off the floor, not taking his eyes off me for a second. 

"Why?" It's really all I want to know. The whole point of Bucky staying in Wakanda was so he could be free of his conditioning, so why is this guy still here?

"Why what?" His tone is flat, but cautious. He's just as wary of me as I am of him.

"Why are you here?" I elaborate. "You're not supposed to exist anymore." 

"No," he begins to argue, then falls silent. When I exhibit no reaction, either positively or negatively, he continues. "No. The words are gone, not me." 

"So why are you here?" I ask one more time. "Why not Bucky?" 

"He went away." 

Oh, right, as if that explains everything. 

"Went away?" I repeat. "For how long? For a little while? Forever?"

God, I hope it's not forever. I genuinely don't know what I would do if this was a permanent situation. What would Bucky want me to do?

Jesus fucking Christ, if this isn't a permanent situation, then I have to tell Bucky.

"For a little while." Oh, thank God. "I'll go away soon." 

"Alright, just.. " I rub my forehead, feeling a headache coming on. "Just sit back down. I need to make a call." 

He complies immediately, sliding back down onto the kitchen floor. I almost tell him that he doesn't need to follow my orders, but I stop myself. Telling him that could come back and bite me in the ass if he ever becomes hostile. 

I seclude myself in my room in order to have privacy for my phonecall with Dr. Raynor. 

------

"I'd had the idea for a while," I say miserably. "I thought that his.. little moments of being distant could have something to do with his conditioning, but I didn't want it to be true." 

I'm sitting in Dr. Raynor's office- alone. I scheduled this meeting without his knowledge and now I'm discussing him behind his back while he's out doing something with Sam. I don't know what; they never tell me anything.

"I don't think that it's necessarily a bad thing," Dr. Raynor tells me, and I gape at her like she's crazy. "If the words are really gone like he says they are, then no one can use the Winter Soldier. And if he's not hostile and he listens to you, I don't think he'll hurt anyone." 

"What will he do then?" I just want to know what makes him take Bucky's place.

"He'll protect James." 

I immediately open my mouth to argue that Bucky hates the Soldier with his whole being and that he can do a fine job protecting himself, but she raises a hand to silence me.

"Let me finish, Rogers. There are trauma based mental disorders in which a... a different mindset or even a different personality will take over to protect the original personality if they become triggered." I have no idea what she's going on about, but she has a degree and I don't, so I stay quiet. "I think this could be something similar. I know James experiences nightmares and flashbacks, and something like that could trigger him. The Winter Soldier stepping in could just be a knee-jerk reaction from all the brainwashing, but in this situation it would prevent him from being further traumatized by his past." 

"So," I say slowly, trying to sum everything up in a way that I might understand a bit better, "he becomes the Winter Soldier when something triggers a flashback, and it stops the flashback from hurting him." 

"Yes, that's what I think," she confirms. 

"And it's not a bad thing?" 

"Not in the way you mean."

"Great!" I stand up, definitely feeling better than I was before. "That's really all I-"

"I'll tell you what is a bad thing, though," she interrupts just as I'm about to leave her office.

"What's that?" 

"You have to tell James about this." 

I already knew this, but the last thing I need is to be reminded of it.

"Fuck." 

--------

After I get home, I wait around anxiously for Bucky to return, too. I want to get this over with quickly because I've known about this for days and I don't want to keep it from him for another second. 

Despite the freezing temperatures outside, Bucky is all sweaty when he comes in.

"We went on a run," he explains when he sees my face. 

"On your leg?" Though fully aware of his enhanced healing speed, I'm still mindful of his injuries.

"My leg is fine," he assures me as I usher him into a chair. 

"You should sit down anyway. We've got something kinda heavy to talk about."

(I was gonna write the conversation but then I was tired so I'll just have it be the beginning of next chapter.)