Flashing Lights - J.B / N.B

...Ready For It?

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It's been two weeks since the golf course incident and football season officially started since last week. Making it harder for me to talk to Sam about what happened with Joe. Usually I would be able to see him after each game, especially during dinner with our parents for every Bengals' win. But that just wasn't the case during the past two weeks. With the Bengals coming up short against the Steelers last week and the Cowboys yesterday, the heavy losses took a toll on my brother, leading him to leaving early in the mornings to get some extra practice in the facility and staying over at Joe's to watch game tape until late at night. Sometimes he would just sleep over instead of coming home.

Which led me to be all alone in the house, busying myself with work and photoshoots to try to die out my guilt of walking away from Joe that day without hearing him out. I admit I acted like a total bitch to him without knowing if he deserved it or not. It wasn't entirely his fault either for not acknowledging me back then. During Joe's final days at OSU, I've only stuck by Nick's side or focused on getting onto the cheer squad. I've made so many excuses to Sam, as well, to avoid meeting Joe out of fear that he's exactly like everyone else.

To me he seemed like the type of guy who plays chess, while everyone around him is playing checkers. From what I've heard and seen from him in interviews and games he radiated self confidence and authority. He was untouchable. On that field he was just like any other player, craving for blood and victory. Yearning for a chance to bring down every opponent that came his way no matter what or who gets hurt. But, the Joe that I've seen recently, away from all the flashing lights and wandering eyes, was a whole new side to him that I wasn't expecting. He was more soft, gentle and annoyingly attentive. He was just another normal human being just trying to enjoy life.

But, that feeling of doubt and anxiety clouded my judgment. One thing I'm sure of doing though is figuring him out. If what he's said is true and he genuinely wants to get to know me then I'll finally decide to give him a chance.

"Chelsea!! Gosh I've tried calling you ten times by now! Did you not hear me? Everyone's wanted back on set in 5 minutes!" my manager yelled at me, snapping me out of my inner monologue. Forgetting that I was supposed to be doing a shoot right now with Elle Magazine. They had called me a month before to schedule an interview and photoshoot for their September issue, saying I was the perfect person to represent women in business and design.

"Ah, sorry Leia, I blanked out again! We can start walking there now," I quickly apologized, still dazed. She gave me a weird look, already knowing exactly what or more like who I was thinking about. Not only was Leia my manager but also my best friend, who I've known and loved since my senior year of high school. We've both gone our separate ways for college but were reunited once again after she found out I was looking for someone to help 'put my life back in order,' as she liked to put it.

We both exited my make-shift dressing room and started to make our way to set, passing by dozens of doors and floor to ceiling windows. The shoot was being done in a new office building that was recently built downtown, which I had the pleasure of planning out the entire layout and electrical of the building.

"You better spill' when we're done with this, Chels or else you're going to start stressing me out too with your boy trouble," she accused as she wagged her pointer finger in front of me. Her hot pink acrylic nails almost scratching my cheek. "I will, I will, I promise. But, can you add something to our contract first? I want a no acrylic nails done rule," I joked, giggling at my own joke. To which she just rolled her eyes at me, "You're a total child sometimes. You don't deserve me or my pretty nails," she retorted. I just laughed once again, Leia always knew how to brighten up my day.