KILLING ME SOFTLY 𖣔 EUPHORIA [FEZCO]

1.5

Priscilla knuckles began to ache as she banged her fists against the metal bars of the front door. She continued the loud noises until the small recording light of the surveillance camera lit up, meaning that Ash had been watching.

Priscilla stopped, turning her body towards his view, "Tell him to wake up!" The light suddenly turned off and a couple of moments later, the girl could hear the locks of the door turn.

Fezco swung open the door, his eyes half wide and dull.

The blonde stared back at him, everything that she had on her mind, completely leaving her at the sight of Fez.

"What's wrong?" The ginger questioned, opening up the metal screen door enough to let the girl inside.

Priscilla waved her hand at him, stumbling backwards, "I don't want to come in. I just want to say what I need to and leave."

Fezco let out a deep sigh, mentally preparing himself, "Alright."

He stepped out of the apartment, closing the screen door behind him. The boy tucked his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants, pulling out a fresh pack of cigarettes. He began to worry at the girl's odd silence.

"It's three in the morning, P, what's up?"

"Is Rue here?"

"What? Nah-" Fezco shook his head, tiredly scratching his beard, "I haven't seen her in a minute."

Priscilla could feel her body shake as she collected herself, the alcohol from earlier that night causing her brain to become fuzzy but giving her enough confidence to say what she needed to.

"What is it, Priscilla?" Fezco stepped forward, reaching out for her.

The girl scoffed, pushing him away. The last thing she wanted to feel was his touch.

"Before we slept together," Priscilla spat out, taking a moment to emphasize the importance, "when you took my virginity, were you ever going to tell me about you and Lexi?"

All Fezco could do was roll his eyes and groan, running a hand over his scruffy face. "Yo, P. I told you nothing fucking happened."

Priscilla began to shake her head, her wild hair falling in front of her eyes. They began to well up with tears as the girl paced back and forth, "Geez, you're still lying to me. After everything, Fez."

"We haven't talked in over three days and this is the shit you come to my door with? Nothing hap-"

"I fucking know, Fez! I know that you guys have been talking to each other! I know about that little movie date, the play! I know!"

She watched as the boy's face fell, his silence loud enough to confirm her suspicions.

"Now you have nothing to say," Priscilla chuckled, throwing her hands up in frustration, "We go to fucking high school together, girls talk!"

Fezco just continued to remain silent, knowing that no matter what he could say, nothing was going to fix this. They weren't going to be able to ever move past this, he had entirely broken her trust.

Priscilla gasped, holding her mouth in the palm of her hand as she cried. "You looked me in the eyes," the harshness of her crying beginning to make it hard for the teenager to speak, "you told me I was being dramatic."

Priscilla began to grow frustrated with herself, the opportunity she has to tell Fezco how much she was hurting, she physically wasn't able to. Her migraine grew worse and worse by the second, her temples pulsating.

She had never felt a physical heartbreak before now.

"I loved you, through everything. Through every single fucking thing you put me through, I loved you. I stood by you, no matter how much it hurt me. Then when we're broken up for less than a fucking month, you move onto someone else."

"Like you fucking didn't, Priscilla?" Fezco finally opened his mouth.

The girl pushed him back in anger, struggling to see through her tearful eyes, "I didn't, Fez! I cried for you, all I did was blame myself!"

Priscilla clutched her chest as her mind began to replay her memories like it was on film. Every night that Kat sat with the girl, holding her as she cried herself to sleep. The night after she witnessed Fezco beat and rob that stranger, his son being forced to watch, the night of the dance.

Next, was the night of the raid, the familiar burn of the carpet pressed against her cheek coming back. The image of the bottom of the policemen's boots, as they stepped over her like she was nothing. Searching Fezco's apartment for drugs that he didn't tell Priscilla he had.

New Year's Eve, the meeting with Laurie. Priscilla rubbed her arms, as the goosebumps appeared. She remembered how cold her body was after her dress had been ripped. How disgusting she felt, how worthless she could really be in someone else's eyes.

No matter how much Fezco claimed to care for her and to love her, he always failed to protect her.

Priscilla grabbed ahold of her jacket sleeve, roughly rubbing her tears away. She could feel her eyes began to swell as Fezco took another hit of his cigarette.

"Can I just know why?"

Fezco pulling out another cigarette. He slowly placed it in mouth, Priscilla shaking her head silently as she watched him light it.

The boy shook his head, using his finger to pull the stick away from his lips, blowing out the smoke. And all he did was shrug.

Priscilla mocked the gesture, still waiting for a clear explanation.

"I don't know, P. I just didn't want it to turn into this."

"What do you mean, 'this'?"

"I'm just tired, man. This shit is too much."

Through it all, Priscilla could not wrap her head around his calm demeanor. He didn't even seem guilty, or sorry for her, sorry for how she felt or what she was going through.

He cared so little towards the entire situation.

The girl could barely believe that this was her reality. It was like she was talking to a completely different person than the boy she had grown up with. It felt as if her unconditional love for Fezco meant nothing, that everything she had settled for during their relationship was now laughing back at her.

"Okay," Priscilla replied.

She took a deep breath, pushing her bangs out of her face.

"Okay," she repeated again, beginning to collect herself mentally.

She had spent months spiraling and driving herself insane, trying to solve him. It wasn't until that moment that Priscilla's blindness was cured.

He simply didn't care, and she couldn't force him to.

There were so many things that Priscilla could have expressed to him still. Just really how much hurt and confusion he had brought to her life, how unappreciative he was of her position in his life, how much better she could do.

It just wasn't worth it.

She was done.

i'm enjoying writing this book sooo much you guys like i spent a whole YEAR in writers block so just being back makes me so happy. i hope y'all are enjoying, still have a lot more coming upp