Runaway reader x hiccup haddock

Inner turmoil

Hiccup didn't like being alone.

His feet(foot?) carried him along the dirt path, mind not caring about where its leading him. His peg leg sunk into the earth, leaving imprints on the surface with every stride he took. He just needed to do something, anything at all.

He isn't used to it anymore. He isn't used to being in a quiet environment, where the only sound was the faint howl of the wind and the rustling of leaves from trees that seemed to cave into him.

He isn't used to the boredom that gnawed at his mind, his body being restless for something to do, for something to happen. He didn't like being grounded and he wasn't used to not having anyone by his side. It reminded him of the years he was.

Two years.

Two years of loneliness and guilt. Two years filled with reminders of that day every time he went down to the cove. The day he made his gravest mistake. And for every day of those two years, he prayed to the gods he knew hated him.

Desperate prayers to the gods that he would see you there one day, returned with Midnight by your side and the beaming smile that he adored. But it was impossible, he knew that as clear as crystal. Yet he still prayed, prayed for you to be alive long enough for him to find you.

Just another day, he would pray. Just another chance.

A powerless child at prayer, praying for one girl and her only, when his fellow villagers' lives gets threatened every other night. It was selfish and pathetic and weak, he knew that. His father knew that, his bullies knew that, the whole fucking village knew that.

As the son of the village chief, he should have been helping the village, training himself to be as strong or stronger than his own father, not sneaking off to avoid the said father and the bullies to pray for something impossible.

He pulled a handful of his hair and sighed, breathing in a deep breath of the cool air after realizing he had been holding it. He shouldn't have this mindset anymore, especially not now.

Things have changed for the better now. He has amazing friends who believes in him and his loyal dragon companion. His relationship with his dad had improved significantly and Berk has prospered with the help of dragons. And for the cherry on top,

He found his best friend again.

God, his cheeks warmed at the mere thought of you. He quickly shook his head and ruffled his already messy hair, as if that would shake you out of his thoughts.

Thor, he had hoped these feelings would eventually fade over time, but they seem to grow day by day just as how you grow more and more beautiful, and his daily retreats doesn't help much either.

Day after day, along with his prayer, he would imagine what it would have been like if you were still here. Would you rant to him about your parents forcing you into dragon academy? Would you intentionally fail because you didn't want to hurt dragons? Or would you excel in it just how he did?

Would you fight along side with him to defeat the queen? No doubt. But would you stay by his side when he fell into the coma? Would you hold his hand and comb his hair, while mumbling nothingness to him, just like how you would when he was sleeping on your lap? Would you hug him while cursing him for worrying you when he wakes?

Would he then have the courage and time to confess his feelings to you?

He sighed. So many questions and possibilities that could have happened, all deemed impossible after that damned day, by his damned self. Why did he have to be so weak?

"Shit!"

A yelp interrupted his train of negative thoughts. Hiccup would have assumed his mind was playing tricks on him if it wasn't for the loud explosion that erupted nearby. He instinctively ducked and shielded himself. Luckily, all it caused was a ring in his ear because of his close distance.