Regret

Won't Happen Again

 I start leaning in.

 I know I'm not supposed to be doing this but I just...she's so...and I think I...no.

 I sigh and take my forehead from hers. "I don't know" I say backing away. "I uh" I start looking at the ground.

 I can hear her fidgeting.

I look up and she's looking at me with hurt eyes.

It makes me want to punch myself for hurting her.

Stupid right?

 She shakes her head and crosses her arms. "come on I'm cold and tired I wanna get home she says her voice unsteady.

We start walking again.

We arrive at her house and I stop at the bottom steps of her porch as she continues to the top. "Thanks again for leaving early" I say. She lets out a shakey breath. She nods a 'your welcome'. "Thanks f-for walking me h-home" she stutters out.  I nod "So uh bye." I say and she sends me a smile and waves bye before going into her house. I sigh and walk the rest of the way home

As soon as i'm in my room I take off my shirt and switch into some shorts. I face plant myself into my pillows and sigh heavily. I know i'm not going to sleep until I think all of my thoughts through so I start.

I know I cant like her. So theres not point in arguing with that.

But what if shes different?

The love of my life said she changed that she was 'different' and look at how that turned out.

That doesn't mean every girl is the same.

I remember the last time you told me that. That didn't work out either.

You know shes different not like them so why are you being so tough about it.

Because I don't wanna get hurt again. I wont get hurt again. I'm not gonna sit here and get love sick because of stupid feelings that don't make sense. Especially when they aren't returned.

But shes so perfect you wouldn't hurt her. You couldn't. Shes so fragile. You wouldn't break her heart. You don't have the guts.

Watch me.

Sammie's Pov

I walk into my house.

I realize I don't have my book bag.

Oh well I finished my homework anyways. I see a note on the counter. I don't bother reading it because I know that my mom is working late tonight.

I drag myself up stairs to my room, go my bathroom change into my pajamas.

 I look at the mirror and notice the still visible scars on my arms. I sigh and snap my eyes away from my arms to my lips. I raise my hand and touch them. relax. The word echos in my head.

It triggers my non stop questions.

Was he gonna kiss me? Why did his lips look soft? Why didn't he kiss me? Is it me? Did I do something wrong?  Did I want him to kiss me?

That question stopped more from popping into my head.

Did I want him to kiss me?

I shook my head. Nope just a spur of the moment.

Well that's a lie.

Is not.

Is too. You wanted to kiss him. You were pretty disappointed when he didn't.

No I wasn't.

You probably like him too.

Do not.

You sure about that.

Positive, I don't plan on dating a player. Now stop arguing with me!

take my hand from my mouth and walk out my bathroom. Did I just have a argument with myself?

I lay in bed, trying to sleep but failing badly. relax. I hear echo again. I sigh and do just that. Letting myself black out.

~~~~~~~~

A/N Sooooo my first A/N. My friend said she doesn't like it when people don't write to their fans. And I said I only have 14 but she was like Write to them! So here I am. A big thank you to my friend Ashley. Sorry this one was short :/ I got lazy. ANYWAYS. Don't touch the orange rain. Its not healthy.

Oh and that's Janie on the side!

Love you peoples! -Bunnie