The Heir of Night

38

"Trying to find a way out?" Nyx asked, stepping forward. Theia leaned against the railing of the bridge, crossing her arms. She watched the snow fall against him, clinging to his body and hair like he called for it.

"It'd be the cleanest way," she murmured, dropping her eyes to the wood. Snow melted when it touched.

"Az let me know you were looking at the river. I figured I should step in before you went for a swim."

She let out a humorless chuckle, turning her head to watch the ice drift. A swim would be nice. She didn't turn her head when Nyx's boots tapped against the bridge. She felt his warmth, how close his body was to hers. She nearly leaned into it, but remained still. Large hands took hers, uncrossing her arms. Theia frowned, closing her eyes as Nyx pressed her hands against his chest.

"This doesn't feel like freedom," Theia whispered, letting her head fall forward. She hated herself for the way her body seemed to relax at his touch.

"Nobody said it was," he responded softly, lifting one of her hands to his cheek. She felt the rough hair beneath her palm, warm lips pressing to the pulse on her wrist. Once again, her mind couldn't keep up with his demeanor. One moment, he's got her in a bruising touch as he shouts, the next, peppering kisses against her numb skin. She wondered who gave him these sides to his personality.

She didn't like the touch only because it came from Nyx, though her body craved it. Her soul begged for those gentle holds, the soft words. It felt so strange, yet she clung to it like a lifeline. She didn't open her eyes as he pulled her in, warming the rest of her body with his. One hand took both of hers against his chest, a knuckle brushing beneath her chin.

A shiver ran down her spine, the wooden beam pressing against her lower back. Theia didn't want his family to know she enjoyed his touch, found comfort and torture in his presence. She felt as though it would be wrong to entertain their son while they provided a home for her.

The knuckle on her chin brushed along her jaw, his rough palm sliding against her cheek as his fingers combed themselves into her hair. Theia frowned, leaning into the touch. Her mind and body worked against each other; one craving, one screaming. It wasn't the burning flame he placed low in her stomach when his teeth scraped her skin, it was a gentle warmth that flowered in her sternum, kissing her spine.

"It's just us," he whispered. Theia shivered again at the touch of his warm breath. He knew the thoughts that crossed her, knew what held her back. Her eyes burned as she opened them, not shocked to see him so close in blurry vision. Her tear turned to a biting chill on her cheek, a shuddering sigh shaking her chest when his lips kissed it away.

"I don't want to, I hate you," she whispered, voice cracking. A smile spread on the lips on her cheek before pulling away.

"You need someone, and I'm here. I don't have to distract you with sex everytime, Theia. If you're willing, I could hold you together while you break. There's nothing to shy away from, I've seen every side of you," he murmured. Theia lifted her eyes to meet his. Another tear slipped away.

She didn't understand how he was so willing, yet hated her all the same. She didn't understand her own emotions, finding comfort in someone that tore her to shreds. Theia slid her hand from his gentle grip, running it along his chest and neck, feeling the scruff of his unshaven face. She wanted to smile when she felt his jaw ripple beneath her touch, thinking back to all the times she wondered what it would feel like.

She leaned into him well enough that his hand dropped hers and fell to her waist, holding her in place. With another shaking breath, she laid her head onto his chest. There she heard his familiar heartbeat, filling her body enough that hers beat in time. Snow kissed her knuckles, making her shiver. Theia slid her hand back down his chest and tucked it between them with her other. His palm splayed across the side of her head, anchoring her to his heartbeat.