"Just turn around and walk away, sweetheart. I'll be nice and pretend I didn't see you, just for today"
With amusement in her tone, Mars gives Amaya a wink. Still, it does not feel overly flirtatious or amusing in any way. Instead, it is almost thre...
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⚠️ bruises ⚠️
Monday, Mid-November. Present time.
This might be the worst day of her entire life.
The worst part? It's only going to get worse from here.
Constant, intensifying torture, that just never lets go. It continues until the day she takes her very last breath. A pain that never gives her refuge, a sorrow that never loosens its claws. Amaya is consumed. Completely consumed by the horror of the situation. The pain that she will find herself in from now on, every day, every hour, every minute and every second. It will never get better.
It might be a little dramatic, but for now, Amaya doesn't feel like it is.
Not just because Mars has left her. Not just because of that. But because of everything that entails. The pain, the torture she must put up with for the rest of her life. The tiny, destructive cage that they have left her in, and are planning to leave her in forever. The reality which she knew from the beginning, and yet tried to forget and ignore time and time again.
Amaya walks slowly through the hallway, on her way to her bedroom. Her eyes stare into nothingness.
The reality is that she is trapped. Trapped in this family, trapped to do their bidding and follow their will for as long as she is alive. For as long as they are alive. She can't do anything, ever, at all. Not dating Mars is just the tip of the iceberg. She is trapped, having entered a bear-trap when she was sent to live in this mansion with this family, waiting with a bleeding foot and screaming howls for the hunter to come and relieve her from this pain.
But there is no hunter. There is only her. She is the only one who is capable of relieving herself from this world, and Amaya does not feel desperate enough to do so. The pain is torturous, but she sees no positive in letting it all go. That would be too easy. Right now, the sorrow that overwhelms her wants pain and pain and more pain. Pain comes from being alive. She wants to suffer some more.
Outside it's dark, but Amaya doesn't want to think about that. For if she thinks about the darkness and the moon outside, she'll think of Mars, and how she must be sitting somewhere in her own apartment while staring at that same moon. Amaya doesn't want to think, because thinking makes her feel free. Free to roam, free to fly wherever, free to think and do. But she's not free, and so, she does not want to think.
Amaya stops in front of her bedroom door, and just breathes. Nothing makes sense, yet. Reality hasn't sunk in. Her head is spinning, and then turning and twisting from one side to the other. One side mourning the puppet she has become, and the other the loss of the only person she actually ever cared about. This was all part of the plan. It didn't have to be, but now that Mars has said what she has said, Amaya will tell herself that it was all part of the plan.
