Trying. -Bayani ~completed~

-:28:-

Hope POV:

I woke up in a lonely bed, Jordan was missing. I started to panic, never woken up without Jordan before. I began to freak out and ran down the stairs. Seeing Bee standing next to Jordan, leaning on his shoulder, my anger boiled. I walked back up to my bedroom and sat there, thinking, boiling. Jordan knows I hate her. Jordan knew I don't want them hanging out. I pace back and forth and thought of a plan. I marched downstairs and saw them together, she was reaching for his hand when he was pulling it away. I walk up to bee and grab her by her hair. "What the fuck are you doing?" Bee asked and screamed. "BITCH." I screamed and slapped her. She looked down, staring at the ground. "YOU KNOW I DONT LIKE YOU YOUR DOING THIS TO PISS ME OFF." I said and grabbed her by her hair. "Hope..." Jordan said looking at me worried. "DONT YOU GET ME STARTED." I yelled at Jordan. For once I stood up to them and told them what bothered me. I couldn't handle it anymore.

I rushed upstairs and locked my door. I cried. I cried my eyes out and I couldn't help it, I didn't like being mad, being mad wasn't a thing I was used to. I wanted to feel pain. I didn't have any blades. I looked around for something I could use to inflict pain onto myself. I didn't see anything. I slapped myself. Nothing. I pinched myself. Nothing. I got up and went to the kitchen, people were there, no one cared. I needed an excuse for cutting. I grabbed cheese and a knife and went to my room. I had just an oversized t shirt on and I took the knife and slid it across my skin. 1, for being me 2, for being rude to my boyfriend. 3, for being a bitch. 4, 5, 6. I stopped and wrapped a t shirt around my leg and I look up at my door, seeing Jordan staring at me. I sat there, silently, with my head in my hands. I cried to myself, Jordan slowly got closer to me. I bawled. Jordan shushed me, and before I knew it, I was being held in Jordan's arms. I screamed at him "DONT YOU SEE IM BROKEN AND IM TRYING SO HARD BUT I FAIL SO MUCH." I continue crying and screaming and I just wanted to die. Emma came in but Jordan ushered her out, became I was in a mood. Jordan stroked my hair and I just wanted to run. I struggled to try and get out of his grip, wanting get away. "JORDAN DONT YOU SEE IM A MONSTER." I yelled and finally got out of his arms, I grabbed my shoes and a coat. I ran out of the door, and I ran. I got as far as I could, as fast I could, and I saw a bench, no one was following me. I grabbed my phone and tweeted out something.

I'm sorry.

I sat there for a good hour, thinking about what I have done. Literally fucked up my life. I lost my boyfriend, ruined friendships, I can't keep anyone anymore.

Suddenly a recognizable figure comes into my vision and I start to make out the features. It was Jordan obviously. I looked away and tried to hide my messed up eyeliner. I wrapped in my heavy jacket and I tried to ignore him. He sat down on the bench next to me. He grabbed my hand and held it to his face. He breathed on it to warm it up and I smiled slightly. I missed my sweet boyfriend. He turned my face towards him and kissed it. Not a kiss that was lustful, but a kiss that had a lot of meaning. Love was poured into it. I kissed back, even though I didn't want to, I didn't deserve it. Jordan was worried. "Hope I'm worried. Do you need therapeutic help?" I nodded and collapsed onto his side and Jordan carried me home. Even though it was only 3:00 pm and everyone was having a good time, Jordan took me in his arms and set me in our bed, and laid with me until I fell asleep.

<~a/n~>

1st day of the Update spam!!! This chapter is shorter because I put feels into it. Have a good day!!

SeE yA sUrFeRsSsSsS