~Him~

Chapter 11: The Letter

Last night was perfect.

For once in my life , I felt like I had worth. Billie is amazing. But I can't help but think that he deserves more. Someone who will be able to give him more than he deserves. Hell, he deserves everything. The way he held my sister and talked to her. And the way he would look at me. Honestly, I couldn't ask for better.

I don't care if Kurt had Cortney. Because now I have Billie. I lay in my bed wide awake. I can't sleep. I turn to my side to check the time, 4:30. " Fuck it " I thought. So I stood up from my bed and made my way into the kitchen. There was a letter on the counter. Weird.

I open the letter, revealing the message my mother had left.

Dear Jules,

I hope if you read this, you're at least sober.
I can't handle this pain. I know it is selfish, but at least hear me out on this one. I know you've hated me for a long time. And fair enough. I know I've been quite a shitty mom. But I do love you.

I want to thank you for taking care of your sister. She admires you so so much. Please look after the café for me. I trust you.

Love,
Loraine.

I can feel my heart breaking by every single sentence I read. Why is she sorry now.

At least she admitted that she is a shitty mom , I'll give her that. I can't help but wonder where she is. Did she kill herself? Did she run away?

Where is my dad in all of this?. My lips started to go dry and my vision slowly started to get blurrier by the second.

"What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck" I whispered to myself repeatedly. What the fuck am I going to do. I don't have my license, and if my mom did kill herself we will be put in a orphanage.

I just know my father won't help us out, because he is just a fucking prick. I bet he'll just steal all my mothers money. It's not like she has a lot to spend anyways.

I pick up the note in rage and storm into my father's room. " Dad" I said. He is still sleeping. 'Fuck ' I thought. " Dad wake your ass up" I yelled. He jumped out of bed scratching his eyes. " What is wrong with you Jules, what do you want." He said yelling. S just looked at him and answered him by throwing the enter down on the bed and making my way to my room.

" Fucking grown ups. They always think we know everything. I'm just a fucking kid." I mumbled to myself wiping the tears from my eyes.

As I closed my door, a loud bang can be heard coming from my father's room.
I can't help but feel guilty , that I spoke to my dad that way.
But for God's sakes he annoys me.

As I put on black sabbath on the record player , footsteps could be heard coming towards my room.

I close my eyes, knowing what might come next.
"Did you know about this?" He asked his voice
"No I didn't, I thought you knew about it that's why I brought the thing to you.." I mumbled.
"What's that? Speak louder girl! "
I'm so over this.. I take a deep breath in.

"Can I just go to sleep please, it's late and I'm tired...".
"Fine, but this conversation isn't over Jules.. I want to know where your mother is." He said with a sigh.
"Well Don't know, goodnight.".
I close my door and climb under my blankets.

Tomorrow is going to be a long day