Tomorrow's sun awaits us | Seongjoong

Life roams with feelings

Hongjoong lets out a groan before moving his head back abruptly.
It hits a sturdy surface.
"Sorry." he apologises.
"No problem."
Seonghwa chuckles. His left hand goes to rub his right shoulder.
Hongjoong lifts his head yet still feels the other's fingers behind him.
He didn't notice when they got so close. Turning his head, the male watches the katen.
"Anything you want to tell me?" the black haired man asks, noticing one of the brown orbs looking his way.

Hongjoong wants to tell him everything and nothing at the same time. Say that he is grateful for the man, tell him that he is way too naive to trust strangers, that he is way too nice for his own good and that Hongjoong is a sucker for his generosity.
"Remember when I called you soft?"
"Uhh...in what context?"
"Seonghwa..." he warns the man.
"Alright, alright. No, I can't say I remember but I can see you calling me that."
"When we were on our way to your base."
"Mmmm..."
"I jabbed my finger in your chest to prove my point."
"Oh, now I remember. Was it soft?"
"What?"
"My chest, was it soft?"

Hongjoong rolls his eyes.
"I feel like now I see the real you after a month here."
"Highly possible." Seonghwa nods.
"Well?"
"Well, I do remember now. What about it?"
"I wish to erase my statement back then. You are not soft."
"No? Am I hard as a stone? Hey, is it because I made you wash dishes today? If so then that is totally-"
"No, it is not because of the dishes." an exasperated breath leaves him.
Seonghwa smiles since he knows it as well.
"You are kind and you showed me great generosity by allowing me to stay with you. Thank you for that and I promise I will pay you back when I get on my feet."

"I don't really want money if that is what you meant by paying me back." his hand settles on Hongjoong's shoulder.
"I'm ready to help you with anything, I don't mind." he says yet stiffens a bit under the touch.
Clearing his throat, the male focuses back on the papers in front of him. Many questions and answers lie in those papers, all which he must memorise for the citizenship exam two days from now.
The hand feels like it's made of fire as it stays on the man's shirt.
Hongjoong racks his brain for answers and not for the exam.
Last few days Seonghwa seems to have become more...touchy. He doesn't waste time to put a hand on his shoulder or pull him gently by the wrist. Each and every touch from him feels like electricity on Hongjoong's skin, especially the hand on his waist this morning while they were making breakfast. It all takes his breath away and he doesn't know how to stop his brain from panicking.

He isn't used to males freely putting their arms on him though he received the same treatment from Wooyoung.
It felt more weird feeling a hand bigger than Wooyoung's somewhere on him just for the sake of it.
Seonghwa didn't strike him as a man very fond of skinship yet maybe he felt more like himself in the safety of his own home than outside of it.
Letting out a loud sigh, Hongjoong focuses back on the papers.
The man's hand leaves his shoulder as he gets up.
"Then, if I think of something you can help me with, I will tell you."
"Alright."
Seonghwa makes his way to his work table, watching the last few sun rays disappear in the horizon.

"Hongjoong?"
"Yes?"
"When is your birthday?"
The man lifts his head up.
"Why?"
"Just asking, when is it?"
"Well, if today's the third..." he says as if to himself while relaxing back on the grey couch.
"After a week."
"A week?! Why didn't you tell me?"
Hongjoong flinches at the loudness of other's voice. He looks at him.
"I'm...sorry? There is no need to celebrate it or anything so why would you know when it is?"
"We should at least bake a cake!"
"Seonghwa, no."
"Buy a cake?"
The male gets up from the couch.
"Seriously, no, no cakes, let's just spend it as any other day."

The man stares at him for a moment before his shoulders slump down.
"Fine, just another normal day."
"Thank you."
Hongjoong takes a chair and sits by the table, watching Seonghwa start drawing and calculating.
He lets his thoughts wander around and cool down. He needs a break.
His mind takes him back to the fireplace he shared with the other katens and Wooyoung, something about San's whistle now feels different than it was before. Then he remembers one of the questions that could be in the exam about couples in Katedrilte.
Getting up from the chair, he stops next to the architect.
"Seonghwa, can I ask you one personal question?"
The man keeps drawing.
"Sure."

"Are you interested in women? As in building a family with one and settling down?"
His fingers stop with the pencil. The line ends up a bit oblique.
Hongjoong has to force himself to swallow his saliva when the male raises his head up. The answer seems to be engraved in his eyes.
"In relationships I'm looking for a lover."
The one standing beside him quirks his eyebrow.
"Male lover."
Suddenly they are standing too close to each other.
"Ahhh..."
"Is something the matter?"
"No, of course not." he shakes his head.

Seonghwa's big doe eyes have turned into feline ones as they crawl up and down Hongjoong's frame. He looks like a stranger for a split second.
"And are you looking for a woman to start a family with?"
In the past, he wouldn't waste a breath before answering yet now his tongue seems to be twisting on its own.

Has his answer changed since then?

"I guess..."
"You know or do you just guess?"
"I just..." the male shrugs his shoulders a little.
He isn't sure.
One thing he can't deny is that the man makes him feel things.
"I remembered San whistled when I let you take care of my wounds. I didn't think much of the position we were in, it didn't seem important." Hongjoong starts to blabber.
"Does it seem important now?" Seonghwa straightens his back and lets the pencil slip from his fingers.
Now the male has to lift his chin up slightly to see the man's face better.
"Not that important..."
"Am I making you nervous, Hongjoong?"

He can feel something warm making its way up his neck and his ears.
"Not really." the chuckle accompanying that sentence sounds forced.
"Do you want to know what made San whistle that day?"
The male turns his full body to the other when he receives a nod.
"We all have our preferences in males and females we wish to attract and start a relationship with. San just happens to know mine."
"And what is your preference in men?"
Somewhere deep in Hongjoong's chest he wishes to hear one certain answer. Honestly, it scares him.

Scares and gives a rush of adrenaline.

"Someone brave, smart, perhaps ambitious, ready to lean on me and share their worries."
Breath stops in Hongjoong's throat when Seonghwa steps behind him, making the male turn around.
"Smaller than me, preferably pocket sized so I can take him everywhere with me." a smile ghosts the man's lips.
Only now Hongjoong sees the man towering above him and indeed, he feels shorter than usual.
"You do understand I'm talking about you right now, don't you?" he whispers.
Hongjoong feels his lower back pressing against the table.
The blush has taken over his face, making him burn like a candle.

"I respect you a bit too much to pounce on you like on a piece of meat but don't take my hesitation as a lack of skill."
The male can hear the loud banging of his heart. It drains out any other sound around them.
"Alright...I won't." he whispers unsurely.
It feels too real to let it grow in size, this loss of control over the situation. The confusion plays tricks in his mind.
Seonghwa slowly starts leaning closer and Hongjoong can swear to all gods he knows that the anticipation should not feel that good.
He should push the other away or pull away himself, he should put his slightly trembling hands on his shoulders to make him freeze.

A feeling explodes in his chest as Hongjoong takes a deep breath. He remembers it from childhood days when he felt it a lot as a young boy.
The male's fingers rub against his shivering one's in a comforting manner and the black haired man finds himself leaning closer just to feel unfamiliar lips brushing against his cheek.
Feeling the corners of his mouth lift up, he curses at how long it took to feel the emotion again.

While Seonghwa's lips give small kisses to his cheek, Hongjoong watches as his heart trembles with glee.