-SAM
"Sam can we talk?"
I left Tita Rebecca inside Mon's room while she takes care of her. As soon as I went out of the room, Tito Patrick called my attention.
I politely nodded at him and we started walking towards the balcony where he always stay during the night to drink and think.
Tita Patrick is one of the people whom I was so thankful for. He and Dad gave their best to save me after they rescued me and I will be forever grateful to the both of them for saving my life. It's just funny because instead of showing him my gratitude, I'm treating her only daughter as shit.
Way to go Veen.
"How are you kid? We haven't talked that much since you went to Baguio"
His expression is serious but he doesn't look mad.
"I'm okay po Tito. I'm doing well actually, Baguio helped me a lot"
"That's good to hear, anak. How are you and my babygirl? This is the first time you brought her home so drunk like that"
I gave out an exasperated sigh. I'm so frustrated with everything right now. I feel like an asshole.
"To be honest Tito, we're not okay po. She recently confessed to me that she loves me and I did not believe her. I don't know. I think I'm being defensive. Maybe because of everything that happened for the past 2 months, I became so careful with everything that I feel because I don't want to be on that same state again- praying and begging to live a better life"
I really want to make my life worth it. As much as possible, I try to detach myself from things that's pulling me down. That's probably the reason why I did not want to give much attention to Monica because we ended in a bad note. For me, it was something that needs to be discontinued. We were hurting each other.
"Did you not believe her because you really felt that she's not telling you the truth or you're just afraid of the consequences of the journey in case it's true?"
That made me stop and think. Why do I feel like the answer to his question is the latter? Why do I feel like I'm scared of taking a risk again because I dont want to take the same path I took from the past?
"I-I'm afraid, Tito"
I helplessly said and Tito Patrick gave me an understanding smile. He then put his hand on my shoulder while I bowed my head and thought of everything.
"It's okay to be scared, anak. But that's the gist of falling in love. You will be scared but you will still take a risk because you love that person. Someday, when you look back from the future, you will not really think about your ending but rather what were you before it ended. Were you happy? Did you take the risk? Was it worth it?"
I looked at him again and he gave me a reassuring smile. Making me feel that it's okay to be afraid but I should also be brave to take the risk. Because the only way to know if it's worth is to try.
What happened Veen?
You were once proud of having to know what you feel and what you should feel. You were once brave to take that risk because Mon is worth it. You were once happy to know that you're still a part of her life- kahit bilang best friend lang.
"If you are still confused anak, maybe it's time for you to check your drawer in your room. I bet you'll read everything there"
Tita Rebecca smiled at me after linking her arm with Tito Patrick's. I think it's been a while that she arrived here in the balcony and was just listening to us.
