In the Dark

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phillip graves x gn!reader (no use y/n, cheating, angst, mature themes, cursing, mentions of alc)

1.6k words

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The floorboards creaked under your feet as you snuck back up the stairs. Even though Phillip wasn't due home for another week you still felt the need to sneak back in. Something about the guilt ate you alive forcing you to be as quiet as possible as you shut the bedroom door.

You shed your clothes hoping it would help remove the clouded feeling that hung heavy on your shoulders but it stayed weighing you down. It wasn't like you wanted to cheat on Phillip, it wasn't the plan by any means. But when your boyfriend is gone 11 out of 12 months in a year it feels like there aren't even two people in the relationship anymore.

"I'll be back before you know it darlin'," he always said with that sickly sweet smile and a warm kiss on your cheek before he headed off to some undisclosed location again. You were always stuck at home, worried sick, and immensely lonely.

It started off as a simple mistake. Wandering eyes in a bar led to tangled sheets and purple hickeys scattering your neck. Meanwhile, Phillip was who knows where, he wasn't allowed to say but it wasn't with you.

5 months had flown by before you even realized that was how long it had been since you started your nightly visits. Your body had turned on autopilot as you headed out to fill the void of loneliness that pitted in your stomach.

What you didn't know was that your boyfriend overseas wasn't as oblivious as you thought. He had ears and eyes everywhere and he knew exactly where you went that very first night. Graves knew he should say something but he wanted you to make that decision for yourself. Something inside of him wanted you to pick him. Maybe if you did he could forget it even happened, and you two could go back to being happy, but that wasn't the case was it?

Whenever you two got the chance to talk it was short. Quick phone calls to make sure the other was alive and well, followed by a "see you soon," and a curt "love you,". Neither of you sure if the other actually meant it.

The day had finally come and Phillip was finally home and you drove over to the airport to pick him up. The car ride there was silent, you didn't even turn on the radio. Your mind was too busy racing thinking if there was anything that would give away your infidelity.

As you pulled up you could see Graves waiting outside and waving towards you. Seeing him in person after all this time made your stomach flip, unable to decipher if the nerves were good or bad. Considering the situation it was safe to say it wasn't good.

Parking the car, you hopped out to greet the Commander.

"Hey," you smiled, approaching him.

"Hey yourself," he smiled back, he looked different, "Missed you like hell," his arms engulfed you in a hug wrapping around your waist as he buried his head in your neck. Even though he was your boyfriend you felt nervous, and out of place as you hugged back. It wasn't just you either, Phillip was hiding knowledge of your secret trying to put on his best face as he decided what to do.

"Do you need help with your bags?" you pulled away as his hands lingered on your waist.

"No, don't worry doll I got it," his southern accent somehow stronger after his trip overseas, "You can hop in the car, I'll be right there," he placed a quick kiss on your forehead before heading over and popping the trunk.

You nodded and walked back to the car and slipped back into the driver's seat waiting for Phillip to join you. The ride back wasn't as quiet as you had previously anticipated. Phillip rambled on about the trip, well only what he could say. Most of the stories he told included the random stupid activities the Shadows would do to pass the time. You smiled and listened intently to each story but the devil on your shoulder sat reminding you of your past sins that haunted you.

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