The Queen of Him

Ace: Torment

I sit at my desk, the hum of the office surrounding me, but something feels off. Valentina's absence hangs in the air, leaving a void that no amount of work or distractions can fill. I try to focus on the tasks at hand, burying myself in spreadsheets and emails, but my mind keeps wandering back to her.

The truth is, I've been carrying these feelings for Valentina for far too long. They've grown like vines, entwining themselves around my heart, refusing to let go. But the fear of rejection, of potentially damaging our friendship, has kept me from confessing how I truly feel.

I've tried to drown these emotions with drinks, hoping that the alcohol would numb the ache inside me. But no matter how many glasses I raise to my lips, she's the only thing I can taste. She's imprinted in my mind, an indelible mark that refuses to fade away.

I've seen Valentina at her strongest, her resilience shining through the toughest of times. I've witnessed her vulnerability, her tears a testament to her humanity. And in those moments, I've come to realize that I want to be the one who stands by her side, the one who brings her comfort and joy.

But the fear of rejection paralyzes me. What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if our friendship crumbles under the weight of unrequited love? The thought of losing her, even as a friend, terrifies me.

So, I've kept my feelings buried deep within, hidden behind a façade of playful banter and sarcastic remarks. I've watched her from a distance, longing to hold her hand, to be the one she turns to in moments of vulnerability. But the fear of rejection has kept me rooted in silence.

As I sit here at my desk, surrounded by the bustle of the office, I can't help but wonder if I'm doing the right thing. Should I take the risk and lay my heart bare, or should I continue to suppress these feelings, hoping they fade away with time?

But every time I close my eyes, I see her face, her smile lighting up the darkest corners of my mind. She's all I think about, whether I'm at work or drowning my thoughts in a glass. And as the days pass, my longing for her only grows stronger.

I know that eventually, I will have to confront these feelings, to face the possibility of rejection head-on. Because the pain of not knowing, of wondering what could have been, is becoming unbearable. But for now, I continue to keep my distance, afraid of the consequences that might follow if I reveal my heart.

And as I watch the clock tick away, counting down the minutes until the end of the workday, I can't help but hope that one day, I'll find the courage to tell Valentina how I truly feel. Because no matter the outcome, keeping these emotions locked away will only continue to torment me.

I step into the dimly lit club, hoping that the loud music and flashing lights will drown out the thoughts of Valentina swirling in my mind. I make my way to the bar, ordering a drink to numb the ache that lingers within me. But with every sip, her face becomes more vivid, more present in my thoughts.

Lost in my own turmoil, a girl approaches me, a mischievous smile dancing on her lips. She leans in close, whispering something in my ear, her voice barely audible over the pounding bass of the music. Her intentions are clear, but I go along with it, hoping that perhaps this distraction will provide temporary relief from the constant echo of Valentina's name.

She takes my hand and leads me away from the pulsating crowd, towards a quieter corner of the club. Bodies move around us, blending into a blur as we find a secluded spot. But even in this moment, with a stranger's touch against my skin, Valentina remains at the forefront of my mind.

I close my eyes, desperately trying to banish her image from my thoughts, to focus on the present moment. But every touch, every caress from this girl only serves as a reminder of what I truly desire. It's not her, it's Valentina who consumes my heart and soul.

As the night carries on, the club fades into a hazy blur. The music becomes a distant echo, and the girl's presence becomes irrelevant. My mind is consumed by thoughts of Valentina, her laughter, her quick-witted comebacks, the way her eyes light up when she smiles. No matter where I turn, she's there, an ever-present force that I can't escape.

Eventually, I find myself pulling away from the girl, apologizing for my sudden change in demeanor. She looks confused, hurt even, but I can't explain the whirlwind of emotions that have taken hold of me. I make my way through the crowd, searching for an escape from this suffocating atmosphere.

Leaving the club behind, I step out into the cool night air, hoping that the gentle breeze will clear my mind. But even as I walk the deserted streets, Valentina's presence follows me, a ghostly companion that refuses to be shaken off.

I realize then that no amount of distractions, no random encounters in crowded clubs, can erase the feelings I have for Valentina. She's become a part of me, ingrained in my very being. And no matter how scared I may be, I can't continue to deny the truth.

As I reach the quiet solitude of my own thoughts, I make a silent promise to myself. I will gather the courage to face Valentina, to confess my feelings, regardless of the outcome. Because even if it means risking our friendship, I can't bear the thought of living a life without her.

And so, with a newfound determination burning within me, I head home, my mind set on one thing—finding a way to bridge the gap between us and hoping that Valentina will be willing to take that leap with me.