Back to You

Just Say It

 "Are you okay?" Taylor asked me, and I quickly responded with the only possible answer. 

"No, no, I'm not. I mean, I always knew my dad was an a**hole, but this just exceeds his usual level of unforgivable s***," I told her, still trying to wrap my head around it. 

"Agreed, which is why I thought you deserved to know," Taylor replied. 

"Thank you, but what I don't get is why Belly didn't just tell me right after he called. She, of all people, knows how horrible my dad can be." I zipped up my hoodie now to ward off the chill of the windy summer day. 

"Because there's more she isn't telling you," Taylor admitted, now mirroring me by zipping up her jacket too. 

"What else?" I asked, still reeling over learning about my dad's interference. I wasn't sure how much more bad news I could handle. 

"You know I've learned to love you, dude, but it's up to Belly if she wants to tell you the rest. I can't betray her confidence on that, but I really hope she does,"  Taylor said, getting up and dusting the sand off her butt before heading back inside. 

I got up now, too, to follow her in. Armed with the information that Taylor had given me, I was confident I could finally get some answers from Belly.  It was time we talked.

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I'd been an absolute jerk to Conrad since he got to Cousins. It was killing me trying to make him want to leave me when I'd spent so much of my life wanting him to stay- to build a life with me. What a twisted turn our lives had taken. 

I was at my breaking point now. Tossing the idea back and forth of leaving early so I didn't have to deal with having him so close when I knew I was going to have to let him go so he could stop worrying about taking care of me. 

I was throwing a few things in my open suitcase and promptly taking them back out with my indecision when there was a knock on my bedroom door. 

"Belly, can I come in?" Conrad asked, through the door, no longer feeling comfortable just opening the door and walking in on his own. Another thing that was all my fault. I'd had him walking on eggshells from the moment he'd arrived here in Cousins.

I left my packing to head over to open the door. 

The sight of him standing there, his cheeks red and his hair a touseled mess from the wind, made my heart speed up. He was still one of the best-looking boys I'd ever seen. The Fisher genes were fierce in their determination to create handsome men. 

"Yeah, what's up?" I asked, trying to be nonchalant with him. Just another stupid thing I'd been doing since he got here as well. I'd been doing my darndest to push him away as if I no longer cared. And I could see in his face that it was working. 

Conrad looked like he was about to say something when he spotted my suitcase.

"You're leaving?" He asked, and he didn't try and hide his hurt reaction. It made me feel like s*** right now with everything I was doing to try and distance myself from him. 

"I just think it's for the best. You have to leave tomorrow morning to catch your flight anyway," I said, and I felt the knots in my stomach forming. 

"Whose best?" he asked me. 

I watched as Conrad looked at me now. His gaze, deep and searching, was such a lethal type of pain to me because I'd been the one to put all the hurt there that he was no longer trying to bury. He sighed deeply as he sat down on the bed and waited for my answer.