Way Back To You || Jikook FF

Just say it

Jimin's pov

Jungkook leaned into me and kissed me. I was so startled by his action that I flinched from his touch. My hands reached where our shoulders were touching and I pushed him away.
Somewhere in his eyes, I saw a glint of longing. Perhaps, it was my own, reflected into his.

"What the heck?" I pushed his body pressing mine and moved a little.

"Where were you jimin?" He stepped closer to me. I kept stepping further until my back hit the cold wall behind me.

"Why does it concern you?" I willingly chose those words. He cannot keep confusing me and himself.

"Because.." he was in a desperate search for words.

"Because it hurts your fricking feelings when you think about me with someone else?" I let out a sarcastic laugh. " Because why jungkook? Why in the fucking world would you even care if I got feelings for him? Stop this play now, I beg you."

He let out a breath, the one that signaled he was about to cry. That was his habit from childhood. He looked at me once again and in a swift second grabbed me by my hand and pulled me to the corner of the room under the staircase and pinned me to the wall.

Hot breath and tears falling on my face, he grabbed my collar and cried on my chest.

"Because I'm in love with you park jimin. Because since the day you came back, I've never not spend a day thinking about you. About...us"

I wanted to wake up now, it was too unreal. My heart sank deeper and deeper.

"Jimin, back then, I admit it was a mistake, .. that I was a fool. I thought being in a relationship with my best friend would be a bad idea. I had no idea that I already had something for you. Please believe me."

For a second I wanted to step back from him, wanted to run away from all of this but I had to stay, I had to make it okay. I hugged him, tears slowly forming in my own eyes. It hurts my heart to see him this way.

"Shush gguk, it's alright. Don't cry please."

"Do you still have feelings for me jimin?" He hoped for an answer, waiting eagerly for me to start speaking.

"What about yugeom jungkook? Have you thought about him? I don't want to be a home wrecker, I had enough with the title."

"Enough Jimin, it's not about being called a home wrecker, that's the past." His tone was higher, evidence that he was losing focus. "I said I was sorry and i know I can't ever make up for it. But for the sake of god, will you start expressing what you feel? Have you ever actually had any feelings for me ? For real?" He was losing patience.

"That doesn't answer my question. What about yugeom?" And I was too.

"Well I could never love him the way I love and yearn for you. I may sound like a bastard but I tried loving him, for years coz I thought breaking two hearts was too much of guilt to take. I admit I was wrong , my past is messed up jimin. I want to live.. I want to love ..you."

I almost wanted to give up right then, and run to his embrace. But I kept cool. My palms starting sweating and I felt a strange kind of dizziness in me.

"Are you gonna break up with him? I clenched my fists, hoping for an answer I'd like to hear.

"Yes. Do you have feelings for me?"

"Jungkook I - um " I was a fool, I've waited years to say those words but just at the right moment they won't come out.

"It's okay, I understand. You love that tae guy. You could've just-" he lowered his already ice cold voice , "just told me so."