What I Should Have Said

23

Elizabeth was drifting to sleep in the chair next to her father's hospital bed. She was woken by the sound of her phone ringing. Elizabeth frantically tried to answer the phone before it woke her father up. "Hello?" Elizabeth asked. Mason tiredly opened his eyes and watched his daughter.

"Betty, is everything alright? It's getting late and you haven't been home." Alex replied.

Elizabeth sighed, "It's been a long day...I'll tell you about it when I get home. I lost track of time and fell asleep while keeping an eye on Dad." She explained.

"Are you on your way home then?" He asked.

"Yeah, I'll be on my way." She replied.

"I'll be waiting, drive safe." He replied as Elizabeth hung up.

"Was that Alex?" Mason tiredly asked.

Elizabeth looked over at her father's bed, "Dad you should be sleeping." She slightly scolded. "Why are you still here? you never stay this late?" He asked. Elizabeth sighed and looked off toward the door. Her mother wasn't around anymore and all she got was a glimpse of the nurses walking up and down the halls checking on other patients.

"Betty, what's wrong?" He asked.

"Mom showed up." She replied.

Mason remained silent for a moment, trying to understand if he heard her correctly or if this was all some sick twisted dream. "What?" He asked. "She was still in your emergency contacts and when they couldn't get a hold of me they called her. Why do you still have her as your emergency contact?" Elizabeth questioned.

"We never divorced." Mason replied.

"But she left?" Elizabeth questioned.

"Neither of us filed for divorce, she just left." Mason explained.

"Why didn't you file for divorce then? She abandoned you...she abandoned us!" Elizabeth replied

Mason sighed, "Betty I was in a deep depression for years after she left and I was drunk out of my mind whenever I came home from work. Between all of that and work? I never had the time."

"But then why didn't she?" Elizabeth asked.

"Why don't you ask her?" He shrugged.

"I can't even stand to look at her right now. I already told the nurses she isn't allowed in here either." Elizabeth replied.

"Betty." He sighed.

"No. I don't want to see her and I don't want her near you. She's the reason we're here in the first place." She glared. He stayed silent and chose not to say anything to upset her. "I have to go, Alex is worried and I have work in the morning." She sighed and gathered her things.

"I love you, Betty." He said just as she was about to leave.

She gave him a faint smile and left the room without giving him a response.

--

It was dark out. Elizabeth made her way out of the hospital and was ready to get home. she grabbed her keys from her purse and saw her mother waiting outside. Eleanor stood up from the bench she was waiting on once Elizabeth came out. "What are you still doing here?" Elizabeth glared.

"Betty I just want to talk." Eleanor replied. Elizabeth ignored her and walked past her.

"I know you have every reason to be mad at me but please give me a chance to explain!" Eleanor pleaded. Elizabeth froze and snapped back around to face her mother. "Explain? Now you want to explain?!" Elizabeth questioned.

"Betty please-" Elizabeth cut Eleanor off before she could explain, "You don't get to come back here after leaving us for 20 years thinking you could just 'explain' all the fucking pain and damage you caused us! Dad is dying because of you!" Elizabeth shouted. Eleanor looked down trying to hold back tears, " I would spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you just let me explain please..." She pleaded.

Elizabeth stared at her mother in silence. "Just give me a chance to explain, It's been eating me up these past 20 years and I couldn't live with myself if I didn't at least give you an explanation as to why." Eleanor explained. Elizabeth sighed. She was still angry. It was 20 years full of pent-up anger and tears wondering if she was the problem, wondering why everyone she cared about left her. But part of her still wanted answers.

"What do you want?" Elizabeth sighed.

"Can we talk over coffee or something?" Eleanor asked.

"Fine. There's a diner not too far from here, I'll meet you there." Elizabeth replied.