41 | Questioning Everything

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(^^^The song I listened to on repeat while writing this chapter ❤️"

(^^^The song I listened to on repeat while writing this chapter ❤️"

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Today was hard.

Having to watch your child break down in front of you does something to your soul.

It hurt me so bad to see those tears leak from those beautiful eyes.

Seeing the red rings around her eyes brought tears to my own.

Those mismatched eyes are now frosted over and it hurts me to see knowing she now cannot see properly.

All because of my other children.

How do I deal with that?

What kind of punishment is good enough for that kind of result?

I never thought my kids were capable of something this disgusting and yet here I am sitting with my daughter in a hospital room because they caused her to become blind in one of her eyes.

Then there's my wife.

Evelyn.

How she just completely ignored or blamed her for everything that went wrong in our lives. Like she was at fault when she wasn't.

I'm not completely innocent in that sense either.

When that whole scene with Aphrodite and Athena happened I accepted the blame my wife placed on her because I didn't want to place the blame on myself.

I couldn't bring myself to look at her never mind speak to her because I knew the guilt I was feeling would intensify.

It was wrong of me to do so and I knew that.

I just wasn't ready to accept it.

The lecture I got from my son is what really helped me realize my faults.

It wasn't her fault, it never was.

I wish I had realized that sooner though.

Instead of spending that time ignoring her existence I could've spent it getting to know her.

Now she's in the hospital with bad vision and chemical burns covering her entire body.

Even though my son told her to never be here she never even called to check on her.

She made no type of effort and it was making the relationship between us hard.

She is so ready to completely forget about our other daughter because she didn't connect with her like she did with Athena.

Athena was so ready to accept her affections and Evelyn didn't feel like she should have to work for it.

So when Aphrodite didn't open up to her like Athena did in a timely manner she just decided to forget about her and it wasn't something I could get behind.

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