Our little secret

Baby boy

Dr.Js perspective

It had been a few weeks and Tom hand become more buoyant, he managed to pronounce simple words and was improving day by day. Today was the day though I would find out if Tom was coming home with me. I walked Tom to the other end of the hospital. They waited out for him. The usual assortment. Abruptly a nurse took him from me. I went to follow suit but Dr. Phillips indicated I wasn't to be enter. I watched as they took him into the room and lay him down on the padded table and began removing his clothes. I dressed Tom in his usual attire. Hss black scruffy sweater that basically drowned him now, greyish black jogging bottoms and white fluffy socks. He did have shoes, I just thought I was a bit pointless for him to wear them considering he can't walk yet. He had, had a hair cut recently so his hair was sharp, scruffy and spiky in places. As they shut the door, he glanced at back at me as if to ask where was I going. I stood for a few moments after the door shut before I went and sat on the chair in the corridor. There were a couple more people waiting in the hallway too. I thought to when Tom got his cheeky little smile back since his rebirth, his eyes shining and mischievous. I thought how his nose slightly crinkled when I tickled him....I hope he'll be ok. I just want him back with me. I heard the muffled talk, then the rip of his diaper straps being undone and a slight wail from Tom, I could just think the worst. I waited at-least another 40 minutes before hearing anything else. People went and more people came. It was a busy ward. It was like I was an expectant parent. I walked up and down. Fidgeting. The christ are they doing in there. It was just silent with occasional muffled talks and clanging of metal. Tom had managed to pronounce some words now. He watches my mouth intently every time I speak. Is big dark green eyes so innocent with amazement as he watch's. Then the over exaggeration when he tries pronouncing the words back  to me always makes me laugh. Then to watch him sleep in my arms, this funny, innocent creature that been through so much being so vulnerable and trusting towards me. To cradle him, to feel to blessed to be part of his life. Urgh I need to stop, It could all come crashing down. I grunted to myself. The ward was very busy now, the silence was continuous and I didn't think it was going to end. I patted my feet, getting frustrated then I heard and unexpected beautiful cry. His distinctive lil baby cry. I smiled. The hallway went silent just listening to him wail . My little man. A few moments later the door opened and doctor Phillips stood there, I could see Tom with a oxygen mask on, crying while  laying on the padded table. He still had his black jumper and white romper underneath the bottom flaps lightly flopping over his crotch like a short skirt. Dr. Phillips was trying to talk to me but all I could focus on was Tom.

"So we've ran a few tests..."

"What??" I said focusing on Tom not the doctor

Dr. Phillips just glaring at me from over the top of his glasses. While Tom was still making a fuss behind him.

"So we've run a few tests" he started again "he will need, stimulating still several times a day but the chip is secure, he's still very much incapable jay so will need around the clock care..."

"I can take him?...." I asked my heart beating

"Yes, for a short while" he said back.

I had to contain myself from being overjoyed. I thanked him and shook his hand. Dr. Phillips seeming disgusted pulled away and continued speaking.

"He lost some height and hasn't gained anyway weight so the objective is for him to gain as much as possible. There are many options...."

"Yeee...yeee" I said not concentrating

I was just fixated, watching as they continued to prepare Tom. He tossed and turned trying to pull away as the nurses. The nurses pulled against him by his wrists and ankles as they dressed him again.  One male nurse were holding his ankles up in the air as another wiped his bum. Wiping him up to be diapered again, he protested and jiggled about but he was no match for them. He rolled around and was almost on his side with one leg in the air when they were spread the diaper cream on him. He flinched and yelped in shock as the began rubbing the cream around him. He was always such a brat when other people did his diaper, always acting up. They managed to pin him back down again before pulling up an extra layer of padding in between his legs, it rested there like some white sensor. Then pulling up his crinkly little diaper, from underneath him and taping him up. They tucked him the creases making his diaper look neat around his legs. I smiled, looking at him. He was grumpy but he did look adorable. This little tough looking cookie with rough clothing and piercings with his white and baby blue diaper on. Kicking around in defiance. I loved how his diapers were always slightly too big for him. My tiny little guy. He looked like he was going to throw a tantrum as the nurses grabbed his trousers to put on but I grabbed them instead and dragged him by his ankles so his bum was on the end of the table. I slipped his legs in then under his butt. He just stared in amazement at me. They pushed in a more padded push chair, where the chair faced me. I slid him into it, his face scared as I began strapping him in.

"no, no!" He mumbled

"You don't want to come home with me no?" I said smiling.

He stopped panicking. A face of excitement over came him.