Overgrown Melody (In My Heart)

Clock Strikes and Despair Falls

Everything that I cherished was gone. All I had was an empty, greyscale room that appeared to be the only pop of color to hide my shame in. But amidst the desolation, there was a spark of curiosity, a nagging question that demanded answers. What had triggered this twisted reality, and why was I the only one who seemed aware of the stark differences?

——————————————

As Ena walked me to school she had a very lonely, lost look on her face. We soon walked upon the school grounds and Ena paused. I looked around and noticed everyone staring at me. I am used to such treatment, being a performer and such, but this kind of staring was different. Ironically, it was also all too familiar. "This is it, I cannot follow you any longer..." Ena said looking to the ground. "Thanks for being nicer than usual..." She noted and blinked staring at the ground before leaving the premises.

I walked further into the building before heading to where Toya usually goes in the mornings. The library. I wasn't planning on talking to him, I just wanted to see him... Call me weird all you want, but I don't care he's beautiful: His dually colored hair, one half being blue and the other purple his eyes that you can never quite tell what he's thinking through, his cute little beauty mark under his right eye... I could go on! If only I wasn't such an idiot...

Despite my initial plans to only gawk at him from a distance while swimming in my puddle of shame, he seemed to find me first. He grabbed my collar and pinned me against the wall with a cold, unwavering poker face. I was shocked, and maybe a little flustered, but I wasn't going to let him see it... "Why the hell were you texting Kohane, how'd you even get her number?" My heart dropped as I realized that he was angry at me... I mean I could tell something was up, but I just assumed he was upset about the other day. But the way he spoke, it was like we had never even met. "Look dude, I don't know what you're talking about-"

"Never talk to me or her again... If I ever find out you do..." He then pushed me harder against the wall and I felt my back bruise. He then, without another word, carried on with his day, with not a single teacher noticing or caring, despite the number of students who were gossiping about it. From the wall I slid down into the ground, my eyes wide blurry, and empty. I felt my soul leave my body and my stomach hurt. I felt my body tremble and my heart pounding as I tried to make sense of it all. Toya was never the type to hurt me, if anything he'd let me hit him to take frustrations out, not that I would but...Something isn't right here...

I stood up, shaking from head to toe with anxiety, and made my way through the crowd of people standing around me. "Hey, jerk! How does it feel to not be missed?" a kid shouted while others laughed. I don't get what's going on here... It's not like I care what they think, however, I used to be so... I guess positivity is renowned, or rather, popular... What changed in a day? Why is everyone saying that I disappeared when I didn't? I just don't understand... Why did Toya- before I could finish that thought the school bell rang for the first class.

The work was just as boring as usual in that class and it seemed everything was the same, but it wasn't. The atmosphere since my apparent 'return from being on the run for 3 months' was very unpleasant. Students who were my friends were giving me weird looks. To get away from the twisted logic of my peers' misplaced hatred I thought of a song I and Toya were working on together... It didn't have a name yet, but I couldn't get the melody out of my head. I guess my apparent longing to hear the song seeped out through a hum. It's been a while since I've done any kind of singing and it brought me a sense of serenity and peace in my heart.

Again, everyone started to stare at me, however, it wasn't the same. They appeared curious about the melody, which surprised me. Eventually, the teacher sent me to the principal's office without warning on the grounds of being an unruly disruption. I thought the experience was bizarre, especially her vague word choices to describe my 'disruptive behavior' such as 'making noises and sounds. It was as if she had never heard a person hum or sing before. How strange. That creeping anxiety came back yet again on my way. It felt like I had somehow wronged everyone in the school, including myself, but I had no idea how I could have done so.

After getting scolded by the principal and continuing my day, the school eventually ended for the day. I walked down a flight of stairs and found my way out of the building. As I was walking out of the school, I saw An, Kohane who was wearing a different school uniform, and Toya out in the courtyard. Upon further examination, Toya ended up spotting my gaze. He grabbed Kohane and kissed her, causing her face to go red and An to start teasing them. I was in utter disbelief. Not only did Toya hate me... He loves someone else... I felt tears roll down my face as I turned my head. I ran as fast as I could back home and ran straight for my room.

Everything that I cherished was gone. All I had was an empty, greyscale room that appeared to be the only pop of color to hide my shame in. But amidst the desolation, there was a spark of curiosity, a nagging question that demanded answers. What had triggered this twisted reality, and why was I the only one who seemed aware of the stark differences? My anxiety and my desire for answers filled my head throughout the night as I looked through old photos on my phone. Needless to say, I skipped dinner that night.