The land of the Renegades: A new generation

Chapter 32

  All this confusion was giving me headaches and draining my strength.

  Without realizing it, I changed back into human form, waved my hand showing that I give up, and went to pour myself a glass of wine.

  I considered it absolutely necessary at that time. I sat down in my armchair by the window, sipped my glass of wine and tried to calm myself.

  I had a thousand mixed feelings that I couldn't deal with and I wanted to make them go away.

  Melina gave me a few moments alone, then came to my side:

  -When you're ready to talk, I'll be here. I'm going to be right here for a while.

  -What should we discuss now? I asked, still scowling. Let's get this whole thing over with.

  - I am your mother, Eva. You are my little girl and I never took my mind off you. Every moment I wondered what you are doing, how you are, if you are okay...

  I was shocked. All this time I had given up on the idea of finding my biological parents and at that moment, my mother appeared unexpectedly. I just didn't know what to say, I just sat and listened, saying nothing.

  -When I left the Shadow Council, your father had a good chance of escaping alive, all he had to do was saying that I manipulated him. He didn't even want to do that, so I blackmailed him, telling him that if he ever loved me even a little, he would do it and get away unharmed. In the end he gave in to my insistence and got away cheaply, all memory of me was erased, but I was hunted for life. That's exactly why I had to give you to people as soon as I gave birth, I wanted you to live a normal life as much as possible, better than I could offer you.

  While Melina was talking, Caty appeared and was very happy to see Caleb.

  He took her in his arms, smiled at her, and then they both left to prepare Caleb's room. Seeing all this, I asked Melina:

  -Why is he behaving like this? Until a few days ago it seemed like we loved each other very much, and now it seems like he hates me.

  - This is all my fault, she said, lowering her head. Knowing that you two are using a certain potion, we had to suppress his feelings for you to nullify the effect of the potion.

  -But why would you do that?

  - So that I can save him without being followed. There are still many secrets that cannot be found in any book, and I know most of these secrets. Therefore, we knew we could be followed if he continued to use the potion's effect. I'm terribly sorry, but I had two options: save him, at the cost of his feelings for you, or leave him there forever, but still loving you. Everyone knows the legend of androgynous beings, so I did what I thought was best and brought you together again.

  -Even together, I don't think we are strong enough to change the situation we are in.

  -That's what you think, my dear, but you are stronger than you can imagine.

  -What are you going to do in the future? I'm sure everyone is still looking for you.

  -I was hoping to be safe here, especially since my father also found out that I'm alive and probably wants some explanations.

  -Here we are protected from all supernatural beings, but we don't know if the king of hell himself can enter here.

  - Yes, I also don't know if he can enter or not. But don't worry, if problems arise I will sacrifice myself for you, I have fulfilled my purpose in this world.

  All those major changes that day, all the shocks I experienced drained me of my strength, mentally tired me.

  I wanted so badly to go to Caleb and try to remind him how much we loved each other, but I couldn't take another rejection from him.

  I went to my room and had a healthy cry that discharged me of all the negative energies, after which I fell asleep.

  I woke up around dinner time. It was absolutely necessary to get down to the table, because otherwise I wouldn't even move from the bed.

  Everybody was already there. The only free seat was next to Caleb, but I didn't want to see his indifference because I was in so much pain.

  Apparently no one knew that, since they let me sit next to him. Melina saw the sadness in my eyes and the hesitation, so she sat next to him, making room for me next to my best friend.

  And she noticed me as I sat down and cupped my hand in her palms. It was a seemingly small gesture, but it meant a lot to me. She calmed me down, gave me that "everything's going to be okay" feeling.

  She held my hand throughout dinner, which allowed me to eat some of the delicious pasta she prepared.

   Immediately after dinner I went back to my room. I wasn't going to be alone as Caty immediately followed me with the usual red wine I was drinking and two glasses.

  I was enjoying her visit, I actually enjoyed it, so I changed into my fluffy, comfy pajamas and climbed on top of the bed, with the glass of wine in hand.

  -Did Karina tell you what happened? I started the conversation without looking at her.

  - Yes, she told me everything. I'm really sorry, I don't know what to say. As far as I understand there is no magic method by which we can bring back his feelings, but maybe you can try something.

  -I don't want to try anything, I'm afraid. I'm afraid of another rejection.

  - I was referring to the fact that maybe you can reignite the fire inside him. You have to try this and be patient. You have to believe in yourself, that's the most important thing.

  -I will try, but first I need some time for myself.

  I hesitated too much and that was my biggest mistake. For two weeks I avoided him, I didn't talk to him at all, nothing had changed.

  The worst part was that not everyone knew Caleb and I were soul mates, only Caty and Karina.

  The others only knew that we loved each other, that we had a relationship, but they didn't know that we were meant for each other, literally.

  In the same building with us was a girl, a survivor of the greatest tragedy, who had been flirting Caleb ever since he returned.

  I don't want to be mean, but I don't know what Caleb saw in her. She was brunette, tall, very thin, so she didn't even have shapes.

  I had found out that they were already a couple, I had even found out that they had "consumed" their relationship, which hurt me extremely much.

  The point is that after so many disappointments, failures, tragic events, I no longer reacted so badly. My soul was numb, literally, so that I could no longer externalize the pain I felt.