decisions (tom kaulitz x reader)

• 13 •

(i just want to give you guys a warning, this is when shit starts to take a serious turn.)

tom and me were going for a drive now, dinner was delicious and we had a good time. we were listening to music when tom turned it down. "i'm curious..." he bagan and i looked at him. "i want to know more about you, like everything. your home life. shit you've been through. embarrassing stuff." he shrugged. "just everything." he looked at me. "well what do you want to know first?" i smiled tom looked at me and played with his lip piercing before his eyes landed back on the road. "why don't we stop somewhere and just talk about shit." he suggested.

i nodded in agreement and it took a few minutes, but tom pulled the car up to a beach. it was dark outside but the moonlight reflected on the ocean, giving the surrounding a blueish highlight. it was so pretty. tom got out of the car and i followed. he opened the trunk to his car and i furrowed my brows. "what are we gonna do?" i asked him. "i told you-" i cut him off. "no why is the trunk open?" i looked down and saw folded blankets and a pillow. "you see how big this trunk is?" he looked at me. i nodded in response. "i'm gonna make it all comfy and we will just lay in there and talk to each other, without closing it obviously." he laughed. he began setting it all up and placed the pillow to the right side making it look like a bed.

tom climbed in first lifting the thick blanket over him, aswell as moving it aside for you to come in. i smiled and got in with him. i laid on my side facing the ocean. toms body was pressed to mine and our legs were curled up fitting against one another perfectly. his arm pulled me more into him as his head rested on the side of mine. "comfy?" he chuckled and kissed my cheek. "yes actually" i said impressed. "ok, time to talk!" he chuckled.

*a little while later*

me and tom were laying on our sides still, except now we are facing each other and talking. "SHE REALLY DID THAT?!" tom died of laughter. "YES! UGHH MY CHILDHOOD FRIEND SHE WAS JUST OBSESSED WITH MUD!" i laughed. "how did she even get all of that in your room without your parents knowing?!" he propped himself up on his elbow, still laying on his side. "SHE WAS CRAZY! SHE TOOK BUCKETS TOM! BUCKETS! OF MUD AND JUST KEPT GOING BACK AND FORTH TILL MY BED AND ME WERE COVERED! i only woke up cause i couldn't breath!" i shook my head, still lowkey in disbelief of the event.

"i wouldn't let that slide." he shook his head. "yeah. i was ten when that happened. it was the same year that my brother had turned 12 and started sneaking out. i mean i always knew my brother wasn't mentally right. but i guess i was just used to it. we were always together growing up. my mom would be on benders, partying, yada yada." i sighed. "he took care of me, but then there was times he was just... different..." i shook my head, now more serious. "what do you mean 'different'?" tom asked furrowing his brows. "well... he would kill local cats, small dogs, rats, mice... it scared me. he started a weird collection thing. and he would say it was for a school project, but i knew deep down he just had problems. i sort of normalized it in my head, it was just something my brother did." i said kinda sad.

tom looked shocked. he didn't even move his mouth to form words, nothing but silence and a face that said everything he couldn't. "i don't think he's done it since he was 15. i hope not anyway." i said kinda quieter. "y/n... what else has he done that was 'different'?" he said very seriously, he looked concerned for me. "well he would take me on trips with him, in the woods so he could meet up with his friends. he always told me i had to wear shorts. i hated it so much because those boys made me uncomfy. he would leave me alone with them and they would just look at me, i had this hello kitty bracelet and they would always take it off of me and drop it so i had to bend over and pick it up." i said kind of embarrassed.

idk why i felt embarrassed... it might just be the fact it made me so uncomfortable, that talking about it makes me feel how i used to. tom quickly pulled me into a hug. "was there anything else?" he asked softly as my arm snaked around his torso. i embraced his comfort and warmth feeling more at ease. "no not with my brother, i feel like i can't blame him thought because my mom was all sorts of fucked up." i mumbled as he held my head to his chest. the side of my face pressed to his clothed chest. "jesus y/n... we need to get you help so you can deal with this shit... if you need to take a break from talking you can, i understand. we can talk about other shit in the future." he kissed my head for a moment.

"yeah, i don't want to think of too many unhappy memories tonight. that shit stays on my mind once i start talking about it. thank you tom." i smiled as we both stayed in our position. "do you want to sleepover my house tonight? or i can sleepover yours?" he suggested. "you can sleepover mine, i slept at your house last time." i giggled. "but fair warning my room is nowhere near as fancy as yours." i looked up and tom smiled down at me. "trust me, i do not mind." he chuckled and shook his head. we got out of the trunk and made our way to my house.

(a/n: shit gets worse in the near future ‼️ sorry guys :) but, our family is fucked up.)