Reaching The Stars

Twenty Five

Onyx's POV

It's been approximately three months since everything happened, y'all know what I mean. There was a point where all I did was sulk in my feelings and not go to work. I drunk away my feelings and was angry at the whole world. But, Dax talked some sense into me and to that day I'm better than ever.

I don't know how many bottles of whiskey and bourbon I've gone through but I can definitely feel the drunken rage.

"You need to get your shit together. You're drinking yourself to death, not showing up to work or showering regularly. What the fuck do you think she would have to say about this. Y'all may not be on talking terms or anything but I definitely have her number so what do you think she will say. Should I tell her about this? I love you Onyx but this shit has got to stop." The rant I've heard so many times but in different sentences. He tells me the same thing and I haven't gotten it through my head.

I want the pain to stop. For it to go away. I miss her to my absolute core. Her presence every fucking thing about her. It's driving me insane that I can't reach out to her, I just want to hear her voice for one last time.

"Dax." I said in a warning tone. His voice makes my drunken self sober up.

"No, I'm tired of you doing this to yourself. If you don't straighten up I will not hesitate to call her and tell her exactly what you're doing. How do you think she'll react? Hmm, you think she'll like this from you, knowing you're putting yourself through this. I know if I call her she'll be wondering why but do you think she'll come running back? Do you think Myra will come back to you or even care? I'm sorry to say this but that woman is long gone, she's not worrying about you anymore she has her own life that she is living so please do the fucking same and get a grip."

Let's just say after that conversation and Dax doing what he did I got my shit together. That was about two months ago. I lost myself now I'm back and better than ever. It took some time but realistically I needed to hear that I just didn't know at the time.

I do wonder from time to time what Myra is doing, I've seen in the news that she is a rising businesswoman being the youngest woman and she's taken the number two spot of being the highest paid female ever. She's making a name for herself and I'm proud. What she did for my company in a short amount of time paid off.

She did move to Los Angeles and I've moved all the way on the other side, meaning New York. I decided it was time for my business to branch out so I've make big deals in New York, Florida, and even in Italy and Canada. I still have the one in Las Vegas of course but deciding to have a fresh start is a good thing for me.

When Dax heard he of course was happy, devastated. But he was supportive of me.

Even though I don't know the name of Myra's business I hope for the best. She honestly deserves every good thing.

I've actually got to fly out to California in three weeks to settle a business deal. Do I hope to run into her yes, will she be excited probably not, but I want to see her. Maybe it's too soon maybe I shouldn't even reach out. I should just leave her in the past but I can't and I don't think I will. Actually maybe in the meantime I will, she has a life and I need to respect that.

I'm a better man than I used to be. Of course my parents also got on me and let's not forget my siblings. All of them was on top of my ass when all I did was drink. To this day I'm grateful for the yelling and support I had.

I'm in my office just finished up a meeting with a contractor to discuss expanding the company. After everything is taken care of, I leave to go home not bothering to stick around anymore.

Now, everyone is probably wondering if I'm dating anyone and the answer to that is no. No matter how many woman throw themselves at me, my heart will always belong to Myra even if she doesn't.

I was never really mad at her. Of course I did have my moments but they quickly faded away. I realized that no matter how angry I thought I was or how pissed I was at her I couldn't stay that way. Not a single bone in my body let me.

I drove myself crazy just thinking about her after we parted ways. Hell, after she came to the office to get her things, I went back in my office and weighed out the pros, cons of the situation. Maybe I was just a whipped bitch for her, or maybe I really did have genuine feelings for her but the reality was she didn't feel the same way as much as that hurt I realized I needed to let her go.

Not sure if I've done just that, as I'm still mentioning her but, y'all understand. Right? Never mind that Myra will always have a place in my heart and this isn't being sappy or anything like that.

Dax says I'm crazy still thinking about Myra maybe he's right, maybe, but who gives a shit. I don't. I want the world to know that Myra will always be mine but I believe she doesn't feel that way towards me at all.

I should feel hate towards her but I do t have it in my heart to be hateful or say negative things about her. That's just not me. And that's probably what gets me in trouble most of the time. Anyone who knows the things that went in between us is me and Myra, I didn't really share to anyone except for Dax what happened behind the scenes because at the end of the day it's no one's business. Just us. Or was us, now it's just me.

I will do whatever it takes to have Myra back. Every single thought was about her. No matter how I was feeling, if I was drinking myself to death, my every thought was about the woman who captivated my heart and ripped it into pieces.

She's the one on my mind at all times.

Maybe I am a dumbass for saying this but so be it, she will be mine again.