Fear don't fear me now"Gun! Let's eat first! Then we can continue!" Mr Karn shouted at Gun, who was setting up the nets. In a secluded village in the farthest area in Nan province, the father and son duo were going to catch some fishes.
"Ohhh! They look extremely good! Did you make them yourself Khun Karn?" Gun sniffed at the dishes in front of him and made a delightful face. Karn lightly smacked the back of Gun's head "You said you'd call me dad, what's with the Khun again?" He said as he passed him a plate.
"Old habits are hard to get rid of!" Gun whined as he pretended as if his head hurt. Mr Karn simply made a face at him before asking "How come you don't hate me after everything I did to you and your mom?" He hung down his head low as he picked on his food. His voice laced with sadness and guilt
Gun swallowed the portion in his mouth and formed a light smile "Not just me, if it were my mother, she wouldn't hate you either. The past is in the past and now we're both very happy that we have each other."
Mr Karn let out a scoff "You mother and son both don't know how to hold grudges do you? Gun, it's okay to be angry when you have the right to do so! Don't just easily forgive anyone like your mom! If you want to hit me, curse me or put me on jail, I'll be glad to hand myself in! It's what I deserve!"
Gun softly smiled before he shook his head and at the food without any questions. Mr Karn simply watched him without eating himself before he let out a sad sigh. "You.... You're actually hurting a lot right now aren't you?"
Karn asked as he wiped the traces of rice that stuck out on his son's face with a soft chuckle. Gun froze for a while before he silently continued eating. He hung his head down low, afraid that his father would see the tears he was trying to suck in. However nothing every misses his father's eyes"Gun... If you want to go back, I will gladly let you. There's nothing holding you back." He patted his son's head as he cleaned the table. Gun simply smiled and went back to setting his fishing nets. Mr Karn followed closely behind
"You're really set on shooing me away aren't you? Are you tired of me in just a month?" Gun spoke with a teasing voice as he sat on the edge of the pond and started staring onto the green lush fields. Mr Karn simply laughed "Well I guess I am. I am tired of a drenched kitten unwilling to dry himself!"
For a month they have been living together, Gun was more than contended. It had been such a long time since he last breathed in free air, no more congested. However, he doesn't hate all those years he spent in suffocation as well. After all, he choose to be there.
Mr Karn eyed his son with concern. Ever since that day, Gun has not spoken a word about that incident but it wasn't hard to see how much Gun was suffering. Mr Karn knew all too well, how attached they two boys were to each other
"You know.... Tin must be a wreck right now" Mr Karn decided to speak. Finally after nearly a month, Gun heard his name. The name that made him immediately halt in his work. A soft smile slowly crept up in his face as he shook his head "He'll be fine in no time"
Mr Karn chuckled "You know it very well you're lying when you say that. That boy won't be able to hold it for long before you. How about you go back before he goes insane?"
"I can't do that" Gun heaved out a heavy sigh. Of course he was suffering deep inside. He wanted to run back and embrace Tin right at this moment. But he felt tied. He didn't have enough strength to flee. "I don't think the right time has come"
"But I think the time has come already!" Mr Karn let out a soft smile as Gun eyed him curiously. He raised his eyebrows and motioned behind. Gun turned back and his body went instantly cold. "Mrs Potjanee....."
A lady fully dressed in a suit stuck out like a sore thumb stand in front of a shiny black car in the middle of the road now far from them. When Gun caught a sight of her, she awkwardly waved her hands at him.
Gun felt fear creeping through him again. What is she doing here? Is she here to scream at me again? Blame at me again? Is she going to insult me again? His mind ravaged with all types of thoughts. Mr Karn gently patted his back. "Don't worry. This time my hands aren't tied. I won't let her hurt you." He said as he pushed him towards her. "Go....."
Gun hesitated before his feet slowly moved up to the direction where Mrs Potjanee was standing. She looked far at the fields that were filled with paddy. The green fresh air was especially sweet today. As soon as Gun was close enough he greeted her politely while his hands kneaded onto each other in anxiousness.
"Gun, have you been well?" With a soft voice that Gun had never heard her speak with, she inquired "I guess this place is way better than that place." She said as she chuckled. However he whole tone and posture was awkward making Gun even more anxious.
"Still, do you want to go back to that place? Where it's so hard to breathe? Answer me Gun." Potjanee strained her voice a bit to sound convincing so Gun would know she's asking for an answer. "No ma'am. I have decided to leave that place behind...." Gun answered honestly
"Then what about the people you left behind. You know they are waiting for you." She said in a smooth voice. However it couldn't soothe Gun at all. The pain that he left behind, he's unwilling to go and dwell in it again. He's unwilling to cause garm on himself. In all these years, this is the only tine Gun has dared to think only for himself and he's determined to stand firm in his grounds.
Mrs Potjanee eyed Gun for a while before she could finally read his expression and now she was completely engulfed in fear and anxiousness. Gun's determination will cause great damage to the life he has left behind. Potjanee knew that Gun really wished nothing but for freedom and now that he had it, he's unwilling to let it go. However he himself doesn't realize that under all that silhouette, he's still held firm by an anchor. And without knowing it, he's blindly following the path his mind has carved for him.
In one last desperate attempt Mrs Potjanee clasped her hands together and bowed her head the lowest she could. Her shivering heart was determined to cause no more harm than this. "Gun.... He can't live without you.....Please"
Gun stood there taken aback from the sudden gesture, however when he heard it's agenda, he came back to his senses. "Please rise Mrs Potjanee, you shouldn't be doing this!" He immediately held onto both her arms and tried to make her rise. However Mrs Potjanee had other intentions. This time she went down on her knees.
"Gun, I've been incredibly foolish, even if you won't forgive me for all I did, I will not object but Tin.... He's innocent, he deserves none of this pain. Please go back. Go back to him. He's going to ruin himself like this! The only one who can save him is you! Gun.... I beg you!"
She cried as she pressed her forehead on the ground and repeated it again and again in tears.Gun didn't know what he could do. He simply clenched his fists and took a deep breath "Please go back Mrs Potjanee." His voice was stern and clear. Then he turned around and walked away, leaving Potjanee to cry in the road, all by herself
Without returning to help Mr Karn, he immediately ran straight back to their house. He immediately crouched on the corner of the room and hugged his knees as he started sobbing softly. His heart felt extremely guilty. He felt extremely selfish. He was a coward. He wanted to run away.
After a while Mr Karn came to find him. He slowly hugged him and patted him in the back. Gun closed his eyes and took in deep breaths calming himself down. He didn't want to feel hurt. He didn't want to ever feel suffocated again."Dad, I have decided." He said determined.
A/N:
That's it for the bulk update dear readers. I thank you all for reading! I'll try to update within a week or so. (Can't promise) 👻
Till then eat veggies, drink lots of water and take care of yourself! 💖
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Midnight Rain
FanfictionHe was sunshine I was midnight rain He wanted it comfortable I wanted that pain