I Almost Killed My Crush's Mom

Chapter 28:: Truth and Lie

Chapter 28// Truth and Lie

(EARLY UPDATE!)

♜JESSE P.O.V ♜

I sit with my elbows on my legs, at the edge of my bed. The room is dark.

An Xbox controller lies on the floor, with a dent in the wall from where I threw it.

Lois likes me, she actually likes me back. Ben admitted it to me, and ten minutes ago she confessed it herself on the phone before hanging up. I've called her back three times, but each and every time the dial tone has gone straight to voicemail. I can't say that I blame her: she still thinks I'm dating Rita. There are so many things I need to say to her, to explain, but I don't know how to start. I can't help but grin every time it hits me that Lois actually has feelings for me, but that grin is darkened as I realize how much I've ruined everything trying to realize that fact. She's going to be so angry at me when she finds out my side of the story.

I close my eyes and throw myself back onto the bed. My hair is messy and sticking out in odd directions from running my hands through it so many times, but I make no effort to fix it. What the hell do I say to her?

I remember the time when that cute sister of Everett's announced that she backed a car out into my mom. I was so horrified that this girl was the one who almost killed her; that she was part of the reason that my mom could've died without me telling her about my father's adultery. When I saw her, I felt that guilt rush back to me. That guilt made me a jerk to Lois, I guess because it was easier to blame her for almost killing my mom, than to blame myself for not telling my mom that Dad was cheating. Either way though, I wasn't really angry for long. Lois made sure of that.

As I grew closer to Lois, who helped us out as often as she could, I knew that there was some kind of attraction there. However, I still had a crush on Rita at this point. My plan was to ask Lois to help me get Rita. That way, I could see more of Lois, and figure out my feelings for Rita whilst I did. Of course, I didn't know that Lois had a crush on me or I wouldn't have asked. Dating Rita for a year had kind of messed my feelings up: I thought she was my first love, the only one I was allowed to have feelings for. Yet, when I saw Lois, there was a part of me that thought she was sweet and awkward, and let's face it...she's beautiful. I was curious, and my plan was faultless to me at that point.

It didn't take long for me to realize that I was beginning to like Lois, not Rita. My feelings for Lois grew stronger every time I saw her, and eventually I told her that she didn't need to help me with Rita anymore. I thought that would've been a pretty big clue that I like her, but Lois is so naïve. She continued carelessly being herself, not freaking knowing how much it tortured me that she didn't like me back. I didn't really know what to do, so I told Rita, and she agreed to help me find out whether Lois liked me back or not. Her advice was to see if we could make her jealous.

Ben and I tried so freaking hard to provoke a reaction out of her, asking her so bluntly what she thought about Rita and I as a couple. Lois was oblivious, and she covered her emotions well. Of course, at this time I thought this meant that she didn't like me back, or didn't even see a possibility of ever thinking of me that way. One day, I couldn't take it anymore, and I tried to kiss her. I think, if it wasn't for that bitch behind the cash register, I would have too. Unfortunately, Rita planned another scheme without letting me know. I was meeting up with Rita that night, just as friends, to see if maybe Lois had mentioned anything about me, but Rita decided to take that one step further. She told Lois that it was a date, as I found out later on. As usual, Lois had no real reaction when told, but it did mean that she thought it was wrong to kiss me and ran away.