life

worrying

George POV

While clay cries in my arms, because of the pain he has, Karl tries his best to get as quickly as possible to the hospital.

"You're okay, you okay." I whisper to clay as I feel myself trembling.
This is all my fault, I shouldn't have called him while he had a knife.

"I'm sorry." I kiss his head but don't think clay heard me.

Blood keeps coming out of his hand while he tries to block it with his other hand. "He's losing a lot of blood, Karl drive faster!" Nick says after looking back.

I stare at his hand, not knowing what to do.

"I'm driving as fast as I can but it's still a few minutes away!" Karl tells us "hold on a little more." I kiss his head.

"You're alright, it's okay." I pet his head as I try to calm him down but of course it doesn't help.

I shouldn't have drank with David, this is all my fault, I shouldn't have even talked to him!
Not after those things he did to me..

"Those voices won't shut up.." clay whispers "voices?" I whisper back.
What does he mean by voices?

Am I being too loud?

I kiss his head again as tears fall down my eyes too.

We arrived at the hospital and people immediately helped us. They took clay away from me and told us to stay in the waiting room.

"Do you think he's going to be okay?" I hear Karl whisper to nick "he's going to be okay, it's clay." Nick hugs Karl.

I look away from them.

It's clay.
Of course he'll be okay..

I sit myself down as I feel tears in my eyes again.
This is all my fault, everything was and is my fault.

I shouldn't have let David walk like nothing happened, I shouldn't have forgiven him.
I should've report him, I should've made his life miserable.

I told him to stop, so many times!, but he didn't listen.. he didn't care. He kept going while I begged him to stop!

How could I forgive him after he ended my life? It's his fault I'm where I am, it's his fault I feel like this!

But it's also my fault..
it's my fault for trusting him and forgiving him.

Minutes went by while we waited for someone to tell us how clay is, but they didn't tell us anything.

Just after three hours of waiting someone finally came to rescue.

"How is he?" I ask as Karl and nick stand next to me "he lost a lot of blood.." the doctor mumbles.

"Is he dead?"

"We've tried our best to rescue him." he suddenly says which made my heart explode.

"Is he dead!" I shout.

The doctor looks down.
I feel tears in my eyes the more I stare at him and wait for an answer.

"I asked if he's dead, answer!" I yell "go see for yourself, sir." he makes space for me to enter clays room and I could swear I saw a little smirk on his lips.

But he can't be dead, it was just a stab in the hand!

I slam the door open and see clay laying there with closed eyes. I walk over to him and touch him, he feels warm.

"Boo!" He suddenly makes "clay!" I shout at him as I pull him into a hug. "Did I scare you?" he laughs as he hugs me back.

"The doctor made us think you died!" Nick laughs as they come into the hug "I asked him to." Clay says.

"Of course you would." Karl laughs a little.

After staying for a while Karl and Nick decided to give us time alone.

"I'm sorry." I apologise "don't apologise, George." he slightly laughs "no, it was my fault. I shouldn't have distracted you."

"George.."

"I shouldn't have come to your house." I mumble as I feel a sting in my heart.

"George listen-"

"I shouldn't have forgiven David."

"George-"

"I shouldn't have let you meet him-"

"George!"
"hm!" I look up.

"You did nothing wrong! This was all my idea so it's my own fault." Clay says but I shake my head at him.

"I was the one with the knife, not you. I should've been more careful and not let myself get distracted." he softly smiles.

"Stop saying that.. we both know you're just talking." I mumble, not looking into his eyes.
"And I know that I hurt you, again. I'm sorry Clay, really." I apologise.

He lifts my chin up, making me look at him.
"You're here and I am here, we're alright." He kisses my cheek "I'm feeling fine."

I stare into his eyes.
I move closer while keeping my eyes on his.

I carefully lay my hand on his cheek and pull myself near his lips. I look down at them and back up to his eyes.

I was about to kiss him when- the doctor came in.

I felt anger, but the doctor didn't stop me.

I finally laid my lips on his while the both of us are sober. I feel a warm and cold rush over me as my heart raises.

I feel his smirk on my lips and how his hand goes to the back my neck.

I feel myself getting excited since I'm kinda sensitive over there. The kiss breaks and we stare into our eyes.

"Finally." Clay laughs which made me scoff.
"I'll never do anything that will hurt you again" I whisper to him "I trust you." he whispers back with a smile.

"Sorry to interrupt this moment, but visit time is now over." the doctor says. A sigh leaves my mouth before I get up "I'll visit tomorrow." I smile at Clay.

"Be careful!" He says "I will. Good night." I smile "good night." I close the door and breath out.

I stare down at my feet before I walk.