Things have been going worse now.
My aunt lost her baby.
My other aunt found out she had cancer.
My close older cousin whose 18 years old is inside a mental hospital for depression.
Christian and Melissa have started talking more and more.
I don't even care that much about myself anymore.
I have no strength.
Sometimes I think that life would be easier without me in it.
I hate how things are going so far.
I cry myself to sleep every night.
I can't cope with this.
I haven't self harmed in a while but all that's been clouding up my mind is the missing feeling of a metal object being pressed down against my wrist or thigh.
I hate it.
I really have tried my hardest to not harm.
But things keep getting worse and I don't know what to do.
Right now everything is going the way I don't want them to be.
I hate it.
And I'm crying now and I can't stop.
I can't stop and I won't stop until I end up asleep.
I'm surprised I'm not dry yet.
I still have tears left and that amazes me.
My life is so fucked up I don't even know what to do anymore in all honesty.
I'm done.
