So, two days ago I had a field trip to Navy Pier. I live in Chicago by the way.
I looked very forward to it, you know because it will be our last field trip this school year.
I paid extra attention to my hair, trying to make it look very nice.
Wanting him to notice me.
By the time we got there he stared at me only once and that was enough to make me happy.
I kept on smiling and such and even laughed in a genuine manner.
But, I caught him staring at her.
And that is where I realized that I lost him.
I cried, I broke down again.
Life is unfair sometimes.
I kept staring at him, I couldn't stop. He looked so adorable, but he didn't care about me anymore and looking at him made me really sad, I couldn't stop looking at him.
I love the feeling I get when I stare at him. I start getting really happy yet sad, I start blushing, I start shaking, I start tearing up, and I get a sudden urge to run up and kiss him or even hug him.
-Day After-
It was the day of the school's Talent Show.
It was very fun and all.
But, also bad at the same time.
I sat next to my best friend who helped me in times where Christian really got inside my head.
He walked inside the auditorium and I stared. And I know that he saw that I stared because I saw him give me a quick glimpse and then turn around quickly. I frowned and felt like leaving right away because it was obvious that he no longer loved me like I loved him.
But, I did catch him glimpse at her.
My friend Wendy told me that she talked to Melissa, and she told me that Melissa is trying to do everything to be with Christian.
And Melissa knows that; that hurts me, but she proceeds because she cares more for upholding a relationship with her crush, than a friendship with me.
We have been very close friends for 9 years.
And she let Christian get in the way of it. She was a fake friend.
You can't trust anybody now in days, and that sickens me and makes me quite scared to be frank with you.
There was a woman whom was in charge of entertaining the audience while the performer got ready on stage.
I remember one of her words clearly, "I know that there isn't only talent on stage but in the crowd as well."
Right after she said that, my friend Nathalie screamed out "Evelyn could sing!"and she began pointing at me and the rest of my homeroom pointed towards my direction.
I blushed so hard I thought I was going to explode.
The entertainer person or whatever came by my direction and gave me the microphone.
I looked behind me to catch Christian staring at me.
I turned back quickly and declined the microphone, being at a loss of words.
I couldn't humiliate myself because he was there.
I regret not singing because I realized how he was controlling me in my thoughts.
Once the Talent Show ended we went back to our regular classes.
I went to the bathroom and I realized that the halls were empty.
I heard footsteps so I turned around and he was right there.
And guess what I did?
I didn't tell him that I loved him and made out with him in the middle of the hall that's for damn sure.
I fucking ran.
I must have seemed like a freaking lunatic to him, I regret doing that.
But on the bright side, I made the situation at the time less awkward than it was bound to be.
I'm a pathetic mess, what can I say?
