Don't Deserve You (GxG)

Twelve

Dinner? Dinner?!! I don't know how to cook fucking dinner. I don't know the first thing about cooking period. I never cook myself dinner. My diet consists of chicken balls and pizza and now I'm somehow supposed to cook my professor a home cooked meal. Fucking idiot.

I was currently still on my run but had already passed my apartment on my way to a new destination where I'd hopefully get some help.

"Your a day early for your shift."

"Austin I'm desperate can you please just help me on your lunch break."

"This is a bar Blake not a restaurant." He looked at me like I was crazy to ask him for help.

"We'll do you have any easy recipes that are fool proof but still have that wowing factor."

He rolled his eyes. "One sec."

I took a seat at the bar counting how many bottles of liquor littered the walls. My homeboy Austin came back with a notebook and a pen. I watched as he scribbled down gibberish onto the paper before ripping it off and handing it to me. "This is one of my families famous recipes when we owned a restaurant a while back, I tried to make it as detailed as possible so if you mess this up I might actually fire you for your incompetence."

"Your actually the best." I gave him a grateful smile before dashing out the door. "I'm gonna have to go buy groceries for once."

My eyes scanned the list before I rolled my eyes realizing what recipe he wrote down for me. He wants me to make fucking pizzas. Do I look like a fucking Italian?

I grabbed a bag of dough as well as mozzarella, basil, pepperoni, oregano etc. You know all the basics ingredients for a pizza. "Um excuse me" I walked over to an employee. "Do you know what arugula is?"

I checked the time on my phone reading 4:00. That should be enough time to get a shower and then make dinner right?

I walked into my apartment putting the groceries in the fridge and then doing an everything shower. I don't know why I cared about my appearance so much considering it was just a study session.

I poured myself a glass of wine as I went to work on dinner.

Who knew rolling out dough was such a workout. By the time I had everything in the oven my arms felt like jello. I slumped onto my couch reading 6:55. She'll be here soon. Why was I nervous? I don't get nervous this is stupid.

A knock on the door made me stand up real quick as I looked at my appearance in the mirror. I was wearing jeans and a white top. I tried to not put too much effort into my look because I didn't want to give her the wrong idea. This was strictly a tutoring session and nothing else.

"Hi" her blue eyes twinkled in the dimly lit hall.

"Hey." The air was thick with silence for a second and I think we were both beginning to regret agreeing to this. "Oh I brought wine." She held up a white bottle of wine as a smile looked fixed on her face.

"Perfect I love wine." I welcomed her in as she made herself comfy on my couch.

I brought out the pizzas quickly glancing at her face to see if she was impressed. Again I don't know why I needed her approval.

"Wow Blake this looks amazing."

"It better taste amazing too cause it took fucking forever to make." I poured us both a glass as I grabbed my notes. We began with going over my assignment which she gave me a C on. I was still holding a small grudge against her for that mark.

"The food tastes really good. I'd like to say I didn't doubt you for a minute but I really didn't take you as the type of person to be good at cooking."

Trust me I'm not.

"Oh thanks." I wasn't sure if I should take that as a compliment or not but knowing she was impressed boosted my ego enough.

"Now that I think about it I guess drinking while studying kinda defeats the purpose of trying to learn?" She takes a sip of her wine anyways as I sit up crossing my legs onto the cushion. "Maybe but I think we could both use the drink right now."

"What exactly is that supposed to mean?" She scrunched up her face offended.

"Relax." I smiled trying not to laugh at how defensive she always was. "I just assumed you've been under a lot of stress with your personal life and work."

"Yeah I guess." She finished off her glass as I topped it up for her. "So I take it we're done studying?" She eyes my notebook that's now closed and I take that as an invitation to stop for tonight.

"Yeah I think I get the idea of how to fix my writing."

"Good." She nods her head. "I'd hate to see such a good student go to waste because of a few common mistakes."

"So does this officially make me your favorite student?"

"I don't have favorite's"

"Yeah okay sure you don't." I roll my eyes gulping down my third glass beginning to feel slightly disoriented. "If I'm such a good student why do you pick on me in lectures all the time."

"Because it's fun." She gives me a cheeky smile.

I give her an unimpressed look. "That's mean."

"As a teacher it can be deflating seeing students uninterested in your teaching especially with the amount of effort I put into it each day. I mean unlike all of you I have to wake up early and get up in front of hundreds of students each day while you all look at me like zombies. I guess I pick on you because your one of the only students who constantly seem intrigued by my words."

"Trust me your a good professor even if you don't always believe it yourself." I mindlessly compliment her as I see a tinge of pink coat her cheeks.

I began collecting the dishes knowing after another glass of wine I wouldn't want to clean it up. "Here let me help." She placed her glass down grabbing a plate from my hand.

"Thanks."

We washed the dishes in the kitchen. Her doing the washing while I sat on the counter mindlessly drying them. She was definitely doing more of the work but I wasn't complaining.

"How long have you been living by yourself?"

The question hit a soft spot not really liking to talk about my personal life with people.

"Um awhile I guess."

"Your avoiding the question." She sung out finishing up cleaning and instead leaning against the counter beside me.

"We'll I moved here about a month ago by myself. But before that I was switching around the foster care system so I never really settled anywhere." I hopped off the counter walking back over to the living room. "Want anymore wine?" I poured myself a fourth glass holding up the empty bottle.

"No I'm okay."

"That's good there's no more left." I hold the bottle upside down as her lips curl up. "So what are you gonna do the rest of your night?" I ask walking back into the kitchen to toss away the empty wine bottle.

"Probably some marking and then go to bed."

"Wow that sounds fun." I roll my eyes.

"Oh and what your doing tonight is so much better?"

"Fair point." I finish off my last glass definitely cutting myself off now. I really wasn't much of a drinker but recently I found it the only thing to do, especially when those blue eyes were constantly on me. At what point is it socially acceptable to label a person an alcoholic?

"Want me to head out?" She asked innocently as I looked over at her. She stood in the middle of my apartment with her arms crossed, her gaze fixated on me. Her tight jeans and tank top made my mind race with thoughts that I definitely shouldn't be thinking of right now.

No I want you to stay.

"Yeah you can leave if you want."

"Okay." I wasn't sure if she sounded disappointed or not. "Thanks for dinner Blake."

"Thanks for the help." I replied back giving her a soft smile before resting my head on my counter. The door shut and I groaned in frustration and confusion. What am I doing?