Don't Deserve You (GxG)

Twenty Six

Sunday morning rolled around and I was not feeling it. I woke up feeling partially hungover and deeply depressed. I decided to rot in bed the whole day knowing that if I stepped foot outside I risked the chance of seeing my teacher who was in the middle of a divorce. Now thinking about it though who knows if she actually went through on her words, for all I know it was all an act and her and her wife are both sitting comfortably at home.

I groan shutting my eyes again as I remember I told her that I loved her. Me someone who does not catch feelings actually told my professor of all people that I was in love with her and what did she do? Well she told me she needs time to think whatever that means.

In the moment it felt like a big fuck you and a slap in the face.

I finally got up and showered any unwanted feelings away as I got dressed into comfy clothes and went to make a coffee. I leaned on my counter shutting my eyes for a moment before I remembered something, I looked up at my fridge counting the days until I realized my birthday was less than a week away.

How had I almost managed to forget my own birthday, quite an important one at that. I was turning twenty, which meant I was starting a whole new decade for myself. It honestly sounded insane when I thought about it, I'll tell you one thing I definitely do not feel that old.

In my mind I'm still that young sixteen year old girl who had no responsibilities or care in the world besides what outfit she was gonna wear that day. I chuckle to myself, it's funny how things change overtime.

A knock on my door peaked my attention as I felt dread in my stomach. I knew who was on the other side of that door and I wasn't sure if I wanted to face reality quite yet.

I stood on the other side of the door my hand hovering over the doorknob.

"Blake" she spoke out "Blake I know your in there, please I wanna talk." I rested my head against the doorframe taking in a deep breath before turning the knob and seeing the blonde on the other side. I took in her appearance and realized she wasn't dressed up either. Her hair was pulled into a bun and she was in sweats and a hoody.

"Hi." She smiled softly at me

"Hey." I walked into my kitchen knowing she'd follow behind. I grabbed my coffee taking a sip as I offered to make one for her.

"I can't stay for long." I pinched my eyebrows together wondering where she would have to go on a Sunday afternoon.

"You got a hot date?" I joked as a small grin appeared on her face.

"Unless my hot date counts as my divorce attorney then no."

I paused for a moment taking in her words. "So your really going through with the divorce?"

She rested her back on my counter standing across from me. "I knew it was gonna happen sooner than later, I just didn't know how much paperwork came with the action."

I set my coffee down. "Have you seen Charlotte since last night?"

"Yeah." She sounded unimpressed. "The bitch stormed in bright and early as she packed up all her stuff and then left without another word."

"Harsh." She agreed with me before checking the time.

"I have to get going or I'll end up being late." I checked the time knowing she was right.

"We still have to discuss whatever this is." I motion between the two of us as she bites her lip looking anywhere but at me.

"Yeah I know."

"When your ready though." I place my hand on her shoulder in a comforting manner as she smiles at me.

"Promise it won't be too long."

"Better not be, I'm impatient." She laughs as we made our way to the door.

"See you tomorrow and don't be late." She instructs as I roll my eyes watching as she walks away.

Well that conversation wasn't exactly what I was hoping for, but I supposed we were on good terms which helped lighten my mood just a touch.

I finished off my coffee before strolling around the empty apartment.

Now what am I supposed to do?

~
I decided to go for a run later in the afternoon knowing it helped clear my head. Ever since Evelyn came over earlier I hadn't been able to get the woman out of my head. I knew we had to talk about what had happened between us and my embarrassing confession to her but I didn't even know what I would say. When we had first started our weird, unprofessional, too friendly relationship I had admitted that if Charlotte was out of the picture I would gladly hook up with Evelyn. But now I don't know what I want and I don't know what she wants either.

I hate to say it but now there's also feelings involved where before it was sexual tension and lust of the unknown.

Where would we go from here?

She's still my professor and I'm her student if anyone were to ever find out about us it would ruin my reputation and her career. Now thinking about it she has always been quite silent about her thoughts when it came to us, I mean who knows I could've imagined the whole picture perfect moments between us, while she went along with them her feelings unreciprocated.

I looked up coming to an intersection as I waited for the light to turn red so I could cross. The white walk sign appeared as I took a deep breath my feet beginning to pick up pace again.

The wind in my face and my clouded thoughts dwindling away as I got all my worries under control.

I wasn't sure what exactly happened next but a loud honking and my eyes widening at headlights coming towards me made my heart jump out of its chest.

Everything went black as my body shut itself off.