My Ruination

Chapter 5.

~Maahi~

Your body has a knowing. Like an antenna, attuned to tremors in the air, or a dowsing rod, tracing things so deeply buried you have no language for them yet. I knew the voice-mail my father left, officially inviting me to own brother's reception after blatantly denying me every and any opportunity to consider myself a part of this family had the word shady written all over them in different colors.

"Bastard child's have no right of participation in their father business." I was told. So I strived to create my own identity. So why does the bastard child has to be responsible for saving this family? I don't care.

Not when my own biological father sat like a saint, lost in some bloody profound thought as my siblings defended me to Suman spewing bullshit. I don't care that I violated so many standards the society had set for women to achieve. I don't care about the explanation I owed as to how I have a gun and how do I know how to use it. Not anymore.

"You know, you are wasting all of our times. A struggling woman like you will never have to work another day in her life because Mr Kaushal's wife would lack nothing. You can have an affair with several men and he wouldn't look back." Harrison grunted as I held him against me. I pressed the barrel of the gun deeper into his temple and he gave a devious smirk.

Zaeden Kaushal hired his lab-grown man to work for him and I know he was capable of that. He was capable of every vile and wretched deed in this universe without any credibility whatsoever. He was ferocity packed with bulky muscles and herculean biceps. He was domineering wrapped in leather jackets and deceiving suits for days he needed to blend in with the humble people. He was vindictive with his whiskey eyes, the gruff stubble and the jet black hair.

His sole aim is chaos.
His nectar is despair.

Even when I held his son, safe and protected in my arms, I knew there was nothing protecting me from him. The eyes that held a scarring hatred for everyone, held a morbid hunger, an amorous desire for me. I knew that when he brings his deepest, darkest wishes to life, he will always be the master and I will always be the marionette.

"If you want to live another day in your damned life and talk trash, I suggest you to be the bigger person and shut up." I threatened even when my knees felt weak and slimy and not even a shadow of doubt lingered on Harrison's face. He knew Zaeden was going to win this. I knew it too.

"Maahi. Put the gun down. Oh my God." Athira, my new sister-in-law, whispered and covered her mouth, probably horrorstruck with my audacity but my brother had a smug grin on his face. Rudra was not my anchor, he was my accelerator. He was boastful and proud in me, even when his blood dripped from the side of his face and made him dizzy.

"Maahi, I don't know why he left but I don't think he is going to give up." Antara warned as Arjun held her trembling body. I wasn't going to let him kill anyone in my family nor was I going to be a meagre cattle fodder.

The excited little sound of squealing knocked us all out of our breaths. There were not six of my family members, there were 7. Zaeden Kaushal walked out into the living room with my niece, Heer beside him. She doesn't look terrorized or shocked that a stranger was holding her, she looked rather enthusiastic.

But she wasn't aware of the intentions of the monster holding her, the reason he brought her out in the first place and the danger looming over her if I refused to bend before him. She turned her head to watch the grotesque scene before her but her eyes were locked on me, not on her mother or anyone else who had much more imminent threat upon themselves.

"Maasi!" She squealed and clapped her hands. In her mind, this was a game we were playing and the guns shot rubber bullets. And in her mind, I was the one winning and making them all bite the dust. That wasn't remotely true.

Zaeden wasn't being ruthless with her but we all knew that there was a gun tucked somewhere under his suit. There was an unspoken declaration now, where he was ready to hurt a 4-year old child if I didn't give up. If I dropped the gun, it would be equivalent to dropping on my knees and voluntarily shackling myself. Defeat meant alot of different things right now. It was just a battle but I knew it was going to determine the fate of the entire war.

For a moment, I contemplated turning a blind side to the unbashed threat he was posing to my niece. But the thought was banished as soon as it arrived. Heer wasn't just Antara's first child, she was mine too. She called me 'Maasi', which meant 'like her mother' as if that was her favorite word in this world. I could imagine living in a world without the six of them but not my niece.

So I backed off. I slowly released my arm around Harrison's neck and the gun cluttered on the floor from my limp arm. Everyone in my family quickly wiped their tears so as to make sure that Heer does not assume it was anything but a prank.

I was too numb to feel anything anymore. Relief, self-preservation, self-esteem, all of them were nulled from the blinding pain I felt in my core. I was confirmed I was having a heart attack but the stupid thing never stopped beating. It went it's usual course, softing thumping against my ribs as my breathing evened out.

I don't exactly remember how I ended up standing beside Zaeden but here he was, towering over me and barricading me with his expensive, vetiver, masculine scent. He was desperately waiting for an opportunity to gloat but it was not as important as the officiant standing before us.

"Do you accept, Maahira Jodha Damani, to be your lawfully wedded wife?" The officiator begun, passing a pointed look at him as Zaeden opened the box and slipped the most extravagant and flashy ring I had ever seen. There were 3 lines of smaller, diamonds running horizontally on gold. At the center, was a snowflake-shaped halo of diamonds that encircled a magnificent round brilliant white Moissanite stone.

Zaeden was a jewellery designer, his brand Kaushal & Co. sold each piece of jewelry for atleast above 8 million euros. He was using me as his mannequin but I wasn't fooled by the sham. The jewellery brand was only a frontier for his illegitimate business, namely wrongfully acquiring abandoned and unclaimed pieces of land, lowering it's market value and selling them back at obscene prices. The suits was nothing if not deceiving, the sheepskin to hide his wolfish nature.

"I do." He spoke in a rough, gravelly baritone. The officiator proceeded with a shaky voice, addressing me,
"Do you accept, Zaeden Vaibhav Kaushal, to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

The words, I don't, were present right there on my tongue, waiting for me to open my mouth. But Zaeden crushing my fingers between his rough fingers was a clear indication that this time, I will have my skull cracked open.
"I do." I muttered with extreme bitterness as he tied the mangalsutra around my neck, a gold chain covered with black beads and a diamond pendant matching the snowflake pattern of ring. He effortlessly deposited the vermilion on my hairline as Heer started clapping and involuntarily, others followed her cue.

"Mausaji, Maasi is upset because she lost. You will have to convince her to forgive you." Heer giggled and I felt the bile churning in my stomach at the word she used for addressing him. This man doesn't know the first thing about being a human. I signed the papers as black spots begun blocking my vision occasionally.

My sister hugged me tight, out of sympathy, and Arjun congratulated us. Rudra refused to move from his place, not even trying to be diplomatic about his disapproval. My father was as good as a corpse amongst us, sitting immobile and speechless. I never had any deep relationship with him to begin with, but his silence and refusal to stand up for me for his way of disowning me. And it hurt more than I liked to accept. I was the victim but I will always be the offender in his mind.

My stepmother walked towards me with a venomous grin as she pulled me into a suffocatingly tight embrace. I was starting to black out but she whispered in my ear, "You and your mother belong to a whorehouse but look at your fate afterall. Leaving one mansion to live in another with a 35 million euro ring on your finger. But you will never be happy. He will treat exactly how I have and that is what I will be celebrating tonight."

The bitterness in her words made me choke down my tears but I was starting to lose my balance as my eyelids drooped. I heard Rudra warning Suman but I was already unconscious by then.