ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴍᴇʀᴄʏ {ʟᴇᴠɪ ᴀᴄᴋᴇʀᴍᴀɴ}

The Sand and The Sea

{Levi's POV}

As the sun sank below the horizon, I tried to sort through the events that occurred.
    When I landed on the branch Mercy was sitting on I was preparing to talk to her about her abilities, but she came into view and I seen she had pulled herself into a ball. From several feet away I could see her shaking.
    As I got closer, I could hear her crying and softly gasping for air.
   With the evidence presented to me I knew she was in the midst of a breakdown.
Why?
    Without even thinking, I kneeled beside her and placed my hand on her shoulder. I felt her trembling beneath my fingers, and could feel the anguish radiate off with each shake and shiver.
    As I said her name, and she looked up at me, my heart dropped to my stomach.
    Her cheeks were wet with tears, and her eyes that were normally full of life were replaced with fear and sadness. They portrayed a level of grief I couldn't describe.
    In that moment I wanted to take it all away and bare whatever burdens she seemed to carry, but even I knew it was an impossible feat to rid someone of such torment.
    I searched her eyes for an answer on what to do, because I could see them begging for help, but she quickly rested her head on herself and left me with nothing.
    I thought of something to say. I tried to think of words to comfort her.
    Anything.
    I came up with nothing.
    I could feel her shaking intensify under my hand, and her sobs become more desperate.
    Without hesitation, I pulled her close to my body because I didn't know what else to do.
    I cradled her with one arm and used my free one to lay my cloak over top of her body.
     I didn't understand why she was so overcome with emotion, but I was afraid to ask, so instead I tried to explain my actions to her. I figured if she wanted to tell me why she was breaking down then she would in time. I wasn't entitled to such knowledge since I was the one who invaded her privacy anyway.
    I just hoped that she wasn't upset about what I said to her, and it wasn't the cause of her pain.
    She thanked me after I told her I wasn't sure how to help her, and I was relieved to hear her voice.
    By the time the memory had finished playing in my head the sun had fully sank beneath the horizon, and we would be heading out to finish the mission within the hour.
    I glanced over to look at her.
    Her eyes were fixated on the skyline and her face was mushed against her knees. I figured she could feel me looking at her, but I didn't look away. Despite her eyes being swollen from crying they still sparkled and glistened with every blink, and her cheeks smushing against her knees just made her more adorable.
    "I'm sorry," She whispered without looking at me and I felt myself slowly move my gaze elsewhere. "You told me once that consoling insecure graduates was below your pay grade, so I apologize for making you stoop so low."
    I snapped my attention back to her and could see she was looking at me with a jesting smirk on her face.
Why does she have to be so beautiful?
    I shifted my focus between her lips and her eyes before looking away. I couldn't help it.
    "There's nothing to apologize for."
    "Actually," she sighed as she straightened her posture, "There is. I'm sorry for the things I said to you earlier. I shouldn't have belittled you or brought up your lineage that way. I apologize for my actions as well. It all was out of line, and won't happen again."
    "Mercy," I began, "There's nothing to apologize for. You spoke your mind honestly and you did what you thought was right, and I can't fault you for it. I'm the one who should be sorry. You have proven yourself time and time again just like you said, and I should have known that you had it under control. I do have a question, though..." I trailed off and felt her turn to me.
    "Yeah?" She said as she tilted her head.
    "Why were you surprised to find out how quickly your fight played out? How could you not realize? Hell, you move quicker than I do and your efficiency with ODM gear is greater than mine and Jean's combined." I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as she looked away.
    "I...don't know," she said quietly. "Everything happened so slowly for me. I felt like I was fighting them for a lifetime. I didn't think it all happened that quick, and when I found out I was just confused. My body made decisions before I did, and I just acted and thought about it later, really."
   I thought about what she said. It made sense why she was so upset none of us jumped in. She didn't even realize that we couldn't. I still didn't understand how she managed, though.
    "So that's why you were upset we didn't help. You thought we had plenty of time," I stated and she nodded.
    "Yeah, but if you guys did jump in I would've avoided you and the Titan you were going after. Time moved so slow and I would have easily seen you guys coming."
     I decided to ask the question that Hange and I wondered.
    "How do you do it? I mean, what makes you like this?"
    She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders.
   "I have no idea, Levi. It's just as much of a mystery to you as it is to me, and I'm sorry for that. I wish I had answers for you, and for myself, but I don't. I'm sorry."
    I could hear the sincerity in her tone and the sadness of her voice. She truthfully didn't understand why she was plagued with such power.
    "Well," I said as I prepared myself to ask her about her past, "Is there anything about the Underground that might have any correlation to your abilities?"
    I seen her eyes go wide and the grip around her legs tighten.
    "I-I don't know," she said shakily.
    I decided not to press her for any more information. She had said enough to where I could answer most of Hange's questions, but I found myself curious of her past and her history in the Underground.
    I also wondered why I found her panicked and overcome with emotion when I topped the tree.
    "I've been having nightmares," She stated as if she could hear my thoughts. "They've been showing up ever since I hit my head on the day of graduation. I know it sounds stupid, and I'm extremely embarrassed you had to see me lose it over them, but..." her voice cracked as she trailed off and I could tell she was getting emotional.
   I wanted to pull her back into my chest but refrained. I needed to control myself.
What is going on inside that head?
   She took a deep breath and released the death grip on her legs.
    "You told me in the woods that dreams are either derived from fear, a projection of regret or an uncovering of a memory... I guess I'm just trying to figure out which category these nightmares fall into."
     A tear slowly rolled down her cheek, and she straightened her posture against the back of the tree after taking a deep breath to continue.
    "I'm beginning to wonder if they're all three," she said softly and slowly laid her head on my shoulder.
    I could feel the weight of exhaustion and despair as she rested on me.
    I didn't know what to say, and decided it was best to just keep quiet and savor the moment of sitting in a tree with a beautiful girl. I decided to let my shoulder be her resting place while she sorted through whatever thoughts invaded her mind.
    I decided that once we got back to Trost I would investigate her history of the Underground personally.
    "Hey!" I heard Hange yell from below, "Come down and eat, we're heading out in thirty minutes!"
    I took in a deep breath, and waited for Mercy to lift her head so I could rise to my feet.
    "Hey, Levi?" Mercy asked in a small voice as I finished breathing out. "What are you going to do when you're free?"
    I felt myself freeze at her question.
    No one had ever asked me that before, and part of me was embarrassed to tell her, but I knew that if anyone was to know my aspirations I wanted it to be her.
    "Well," I said, "I would want to open a tea shop. I'd make and sell tea and not have to worry about those shithead Titans or the brats down there." I pointed to the rest of my squad who slurped their stew below.
    "That sounds amazing," she said softly through a smile. "As for me," she lifted her head and rose to her feet. "I'm gonna open a bakery with my friend Ronnie by the sea, and I'm going to eat pastries and savor every damn moment."
     She reached a hand down toward me to help me up as she held my cloak over her forearm. I appreciated her changing the subject and making everything less awkward, but I could see it in her eyes that she was still in terrible pain.
    "Let's go fight for that freedom," she said through a half grin as she pulled me to my feet and handed me my cloak.
    She shot her hooks into the tree that stood across from us and stepped closer to the edge of the branch.
    "And," she began, "If you play your cards right, maybe we can be business partners one day and can join our crafts...," she said through a soft smirk. Her eyes were wide with hope before she leapt off the branch and swooped to ground level.
    Once she landed I watched as Hange handed her a bowl of stew before they glanced up at me. They motioned for me to join them. I sat myself down and let my feet dangle over the edge, preparing to jump.