Fallout: Fury Blood

Chapter 83: Zombie

Redemption and atonement.

That was what she sought. Even if it killed her.

Because of her, everything and everyone was against her now, even herself. The human in her craved a deep dark hole to crawl into and hide away from the world she had made an enemy from, wallow in self-pity like the wretched little creature she was. End her wretched self with a knife across the throat or bullet in the mouth.

But she couldn't let herself be human. She had to be more than human. She had to become an indestructible, invincible figment of her own imagination. Only then could she find that illusion of strength and force herself up the mountainous road to redemption, where atonement shone at the peak.

Only then would he see that she was still the Kelly he had fallen in love with.

It started with the Minutemen.

After skulking back to the niche camp to gather her gear and wait out the sun, her feet carved a numb path through the scorn of the Brotherhood, to the heavily guarded vertibird pads beneath The Prydwen's shadow. Where it had once been a comforting umbra of shelter and belonging, the warship was now a belittling cloud of cold steel.

Kelly stood beneath it's gloom and dreaded the walk of shame through it's halls. But it was the first test of her self-deluded strength. If she couldn't walk The Prydwen, she couldn't delude herself into thinking she could walk the wastes.

A sweltering craving for Jet sucked the air from her lungs as she stood in dread. Craving it's shield, it's impregnable embrace. Suddenly the prospect of walking out into that dessert alone seemed impossible without Jet bolstering her step. Without it she was weak, useless, a ghost of tortured memories and loss. She couldn't operate at her peak without it.

Her ass still hurt from Maxson's spanking, and Kelly grudgingly rubbed the angry spot during the airlift to The Prydwen. The vertibird pilot wasn't thrilled to airlift a traitor up to the airship, but the Elder had apparently given word to allow her free rein to gather whatever supplies she needed before her exodus.

She recognized that as a dangerous move on his part. He might be the supreme commander of this Brotherhood chapter and have won over the hearts and minds in his thrall, but those hearts and minds were rattled and uneasy with her presence. There had already been talk of their collusion and sexual affairs before it even became a reality, and if they sniffed his weakness for her, there would be a world of doubt in their beloved Elder's competence for duty and war.

In the dog-eat-dog world of the Brotherhood of Steel, doubt could be fatal.

Despite herself and her hostility against his seduction, Kelly felt a shot of guilt for Maxson's position.

The vertibird docking shook her loose from her thoughts and she strode across the Flight Deck without meeting a gaze. The confines of the command deck seemed to screech to a silent halt at her wind-blown appearance, and Kelly kept her head down, feeling an enemy intruder. Lancer-Captain Kells' disparaging glower from the bridge below deck defeated the purpose of her keeping her head down.

She half expected him to bring the ship to red alert and blast her down with a laser to the face.

On approach to the rungs, she couldn't keep from staring at the forlorn sight of Maxson. He was sitting forward on one of the red sofas on the observation deck. Grim in his regal aura and manspreading like all hell to exert his masculinity, but the hand absently stroking at the beard was a telling hint to his turmoil.