Why Can't I Hate You?

~29~

Daylight arrived, making it clear to see the destruction wicked caused on our camp. Before, it was crowded, and now it felt like there was hardly anyone at all. Minho's absence left a strange emptiness inside me. I longed for the sound of his voice to crack a stupid joke. 

"What do we do now?" Fry asked.

"Pick up what's left of us." Vince looked around at the wreckage,"and we start over, I guess. Get what's left of us to the safe heaven."

"I'm not going with you." Thomas slung his backpack over his shoulder.

"What?"

"I made a promise to Minho that no one gets left behind."

His proposition sounded insane. Then again, Thomas didn't usually think through his plans. His impulsiveness was one of his most distinguishing features.

"Kid, wicked just kicked our ass. How the hell do you think you're gonna get him back now?"

"It's not just about Minho. It's about everyone they've taken and everyone they will take. They're never gonna stop, so I'm gonna stop them. I'm gonna kill Ava Paige."

"So, what's your plan?" Newt stood up.

Thomas didn't seem quite sure. "I think we should get out of here first, go somewhere wicked, can't find us. Then, we can formulate a plan."

For the rest of the day, we gathered up everything we had left. There was a solem feeling in the air that none of us could shake. I loaded the supplies into the back of one of our trucks when Thomas approached me, smiling weakly.

"Hey." I smiled back. The dead air between us was painfully awkward. I held the hem of my sleeves in my hands, shuffling them. "It's going to be weird without Minho cracking jokes every five minutes."

Thomas looked at me with sympathy in his eyes, like he knew just saying his name was like knives cutting my toungue. "We're gonna get him back, Y/n. I promise you, I'm gonna do everything in my power to get him back."

I hugged him tightly around his waist, squeezing my eyes closed. "Thank you, Thomas."

His arms folded around me, pulling me tight to his chest. When I pulled away, I smiled. This time, it was genuine.

Then, he kissed me. Panic caused me to freeze, unable to pull away or kiss back. His hands on my face. When sense kicked into me, I pulled away in shock, stepping back. "Why did you kiss me?"

He stuttered, surprised that I would ask. As if it were obvious why. "I-"

"Thomas. I'm not her."

"I know." His voice cracked." I'm sorry - I just, I don't know why I did that."

"Hey, it's ok. I get it. Just don't do it again." I laughed."I need to get the rest of these in the truck, so I'll talk to you later."

I continued loading up the truck, picking up a crate from the floor and turning towards the truck. When I saw Newt leaning against the truck, I dropped the crate on the floor with a squeal. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"I saw you and Tommy before. You looked... friendly."

I shook my head in frustration. "What do you want, Newt?"

The way he stared at me made it hard for me to read him. I couldn't tell what he was thinking. All I knew was that it was intense. He scoffed. "I always knew there was something going on between you ever since he came up the box back in the glade."

"There's nothing going on between us. It was a mistake, Thomas and I are friends."

"Sure didn't look like it when his toungue was in your mouth."

I snapped. I was so done with his bullshit that I finally decided to give him a taste of his own medicine. "Would you rather it be yours?"

He went silent, staring at me with that gaze I couldn't figure out. I could have sworn I saw his eyes dart down to my lips for a split second. Then he got up off the truck, walking up to me.

My heart could've jumped out of my chest. It was so loud that I was sure he could hear it thumping. Towering over me, he continued to make eye contact with me. Our faces inches apart. Then he smirked to himself, letting out a half suppressed laugh, walking away.

I didn't even realise I had been holding my breath until I exhaled.