Why Can't I Hate You?

~43~

When I opened my eyes, I thought I was dead.

I sat up, wincing at the pain in my stomach.

"Hey, careful." Minho was sat in a chair next to me.

I pulled up my shirt. There were stitches. There was no way I could be dead. I wouldn't have stitches if I was, and Minho wouldn't be here either. The room I was in reminded me a lot of the medjacks hut back in the glade. It was structured pretty much the same way. The bed was very similar to the ones we had in the homestead, except it may be slightly less uncomfortable.

"You scared us all to death back there." He smiled."How are you feeling?"

"Like shit."

He chuckled. "Come on, I'll show you our new home."

I left the room to be met with the sea. We were on the coast. The big ship that was meant to take us to the safe heaven was docked on the water. So, did that mean this was the safe heaven? I actually made it.

There were people walking around casually, some that I recognised and others that I didn't.

"There's someone who wants to see you." Minho said.

"The others? Did they make it, too?"

"Come on." He tugged my hand, grinning widely.

I followed him across the beach to another hut. It's very similar to the one I woke up in. He opened the door for me, holding it open. I gave him a confused look before entering the room. It was a bit darker than the one I woke up in because the window was covered with some fabric. Someone was sitting at a table, facing away. He turned around, standing up, then walked closer towards the light so I could see his face.

My heart fell into my stomach, and I thought I might vomit on the floor. "What..."

"Hey, love." Newt smiled softly at me.

My mouth moved to speak, but no words came out. Maybe I did die, and this was some sort of afterlife. "How... what... You..."

"Take your time. It's ok, I know it's hard to process." He moved closer

"No, no." I shook my head at him, moving away. My face quickly became wet with tears.

"Maybe we should have taken her to see the others first." He spoke to Minho."Take her to see Thomas and Fry."

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me why you're still alive!" I grabbed his arm, pulling his sleeve up to see his veins have returned to their normal colour .Why - why aren't you - you should be -"

"Love, calm down."

I noticed the gun on the drawer beside me. I grabbed, holding it towards him, which made him take a step back. He looked at Minho. "I think she's angry."

"How can you tell?" He chuffed.

"Well, you can see her mood by her hands. Like right now, she's holding a gun, I don't think that means she's happy to see me."

"Stop joking around! You made me leave you there!" I cried."I mourned you! And now you've just showed up, without any symptoms of being infected at all -"

"Tommy cured me, love." He put his hands on my shoulders." They picked me up from crank palace just after everything went haywire and brought me here." His hand moved up to my cheek, his thumb wiping away a tear.

I shook my head at him. "I can't."

"Listen to me. Do you remember that night in the maze? When I told you i wasn't scared of anything? I lied. I rode back on the berg with you, and I thought you were gonna die. I don't think I've ever been more terrified in my life. Losing you terrifies me. So please don't give up on me now." His hand held my face, his thumb stroking my skin.

I melted into his touch. I felt angry at myself for wanting it. I wanted to scream at him, be so mad that it scared him. When he kissed me, though, I didn't pull away. I kissed him back, holding the back of his head, pulling him closer to me.

"Um, well, I'm just gonna go... ok, bye." I heard Minho speak, then the door closed.

Our kisses became more desperate, and Newt backed me up into the table behind me, lifting me onto it. The only thing that crossed my mind now was how much I wanted him. My senses were overwhelmed by everything, the touch of hand on the back of my neck, the smell of his cologne, his eager lips on mine.

I heard his belt being unbuckled, and I moved my hands to take off my own pants. Slipping them off so they dropped at my ankles. Newts kissing moved down to my neck, and I leaned my head to the side to let him have full access. Gasping and pulling his body closer.

He quickly slipped inside me and started moving. It was all happening so quick, our make out became lousy  and consisted of us both moaning and panting into eachothers mouths.

When we finished, he pulled away, resting his forhead on mine as we gained our breath back.

"I hate you." I muttered, stroking the back of his hair.

"I love you too."