Tough Love - Chris Sturniolo

Numbers Game

Chris

I've never been in charge of a girl like that before, and not only was it completely fucking awesome, the fact that it was with Anastasia made it unbelievable. I haven't hooked up with tons of girls, but enough to know what I liked...or at least I thought I did.

When she got my blood boiling, I knew what she was up to, and the look she gave me was pure lust. But that was nothing compared to when I told her I loved it when she fucked with me. Her eyes practically screamed at me to praise her again, so I leaned into it and fuck it paid off. I had that cheat code now and I was definitely gunna be using it.

We'd hung out in my room the rest of the night until she started getting sleepy. I offered her to stay over, but she said she wanted her own bed. That wasn't something I related to, I liked sleeping in different places. Matt's room, Nick's room, the couch. But not everyone was like me and I got that. I called her an uber and walked her out. When the car pulled up, I went around the car to talk to the driver before she got in. I wanted to look the guy in the eye and get a vibe off him before she went off with some stranger. Turns out it was a youngish woman who told me she specifically only picked up girls out of safety and it immediately made me feel better. I walked back around the car to open the door for her and she rolled her eyes as she approached the car.

"You're ridiculous," she chastised me and I smiled.

"You like it," I replied and she looked at me like watch the cockiness. "Text me when you're home."

"I don't have your number," she pointed out.

"Guess we should fix that," I suggested, pulling out my phone, unlocking it and handing it to her. She took it on an exhale, as if everything I did was exhausting and it made me smile. I wasn't buying that act anymore, but I still liked it.

Just as she added herself in my contacts, my phone buzzed and I looked down to see a text at the top of the screen. We both read it out of instinct, the way you can't help flick your eyes up to a notification, regardless of whose phone is in your hand. My stomach plummeted seeing it was from Ava asking me if I was up.

My eyes flicked back to hers, and the shift in her was so immediate, it was like someone had slapped her across the face.

"Nice," she snapped.

"Stasia-" I started to explain, but she just shoved my phone into my chest and got into the car.

"Oh my god I'm so stupid," she spat, grabbing the door to pull it closed. My hand snapped out to hold it open.

"It's not what you think, she's no one, Stasia please," I begged her to hear me out, but the look she gave me was a pure death stare, and my hand lifted off the door out of pure fear. She may have been beautiful but fuck she was terrifying.

She slammed the door and immediately looked away.

"Stasia come on!" I yelled at the car as it slowly pulled away. I watched as it drove off, taking this unreal night with it and staining all the good memories we'd just made.

"FUCK," I yelled at the night sky, turning back to the house.

I walked in, angrier than I've ever been. I'd worked so hard to get her back in my corner, and that one fucking text ruined it all. I slammed the door, taking out my phone and pulling up my conversation with Ava.

dont text me again

I locked my phone and put it back in my pocket. Maybe that was harsh but I was fucking pissed off and she was the reason. She'd fucked it all up.

I walked into our kitchen and started cleaning up. I needed somewhere to put all my energy and at 2am, there was no where else to go.

Matt and Nick were chilling on the couch, looking at their phones. Ella must have gone home.

"You guys could've started cleaning you know, just fucking sitting there doing shit all," I snapped.

"Holy shit what crawled up your ass?" Nick replied, looking up from his phone. Matt looked at Nick like what the fuck is his problem?

"Nothing, you guys are just fucking chilling like our house isn't a complete mess right now," I went on, grabbing a big garbage bag.

"We'll do it in the morning, Chris," Matt commented. "You were downstairs the whole night, we figured it was going good, what happened?" His prying pissed me off even more and I whipped an empty solo cup at the wall.

"I fucked up, AGAIN," I exclaimed, dropping the garbage bag, walking over to the couch and dropping myself down at the end, Matt in the middle and Nick on the other side. I rubbed my eyes in complete frustration.

"It was going so good, I finally won her over," I started. I left out that we hooked up, because they didn't need to know that, but I went on. "She was putting her number in my phone and Ava texted me."

Nick groaned, tipping his head back, and Matt rubbed his face.

"She thinks I'm a fucking scumbag," my voice cracked so I cleared it, holding my chin and looking around the room. "Fucking Ava."

"This isn't Ava's fault," Nick pointed out.

"Yeah it fucking is!" I exclaimed.

"Okay lower your voice," he started. "You did this to yourself." I jerked my head to look at him, not needing this shit.

"How the fuck is it my fault?" I snapped.

"I don't know, it's karma," he went on. "If you didn't entertain all these girls, Anastasia wouldn't have anything to be upset about right now."

"Shut the fuck up, Nick," I said, resting my head back and looking at the ceiling. I was never gunna earn her trust back now. That was it. I did it once, I wasn't gunna manage it again.

"I think what Nick's trying to say is you gotta do something about these girls, bro," Matt chimed in. "If you keep them around, then she kinda does have something to worry about..."

I thought about that for a moment. I could do that. Sure, girls like Ava and Bella were hot as fuck and that's why I kept messaging them or meeting up with them, but they weren't Anastasia.

But she wasn't gunna let this go, so why push other girls away? Then I'd be left with no one.

"I dunno, bro," I ran my hand through my hair. "She's never gunna forgive me for this, is it even worth it?"

"Chris," Nick stared at me in disbelief. "Are you fucking stupid?" I groaned. "What's wrong with you? You finally find a girl you like and you're just giving up? Stop being a little bitch and fix it."

"I agree," Matt chimed in.

"Matt shut the fuck up, you were gunna give up on Ella and we fixed that shit for you so don't talk," I said, crossing my arms.

"Yeah and if you hadn't, I wouldn't have Ella right now. But this isn't something we can fix, this is all you," he replied.

We sat in silence for a while. The guys eventually went back on their phones while I just stared around the room.

"I'm going to bed," I finally decided, getting up and heading past the mess that was our house. We'll clean it in the morning.

When I walked into my room, I found my rumpled sheets, the half eaten bag of doritos and the empty bag of reese's on my dresser, and I realized my anger had shifted into sadness. Not even 20 minutes ago, she'd been in here. Her voice had filled the room, her body on my bed. It was like we'd stepped into an alternate universe, like nothing outside this room existed and we were the only two people in the world. I changed and laid down, trying to fall asleep for a while until I gave up. I didn't wanna be alone, and I didn't wanna be in my room. I grabbed my pillow, walked out and headed up the stairs in the dark.

All the lights were off because the boys had gone to their rooms and I continued up the next flight. I walked to Matt's room and saw the light under his door. I knocked and heard his muffled reply to come in. I opened the door and he was sitting at his desk, headphones on and gaming. He looked over at me, saw my pillow in my hand, and silently went back to his game as I threw myself down on his bed. I curled up in the blanket and immediately started feeling sleepy.

"Goodnight, bro," he said, not looking away from the screen. It wasn't just a goodnight. I knew what he was saying underneath. I know you're upset and you've always got me.

"Goodnight," I replied, really saying I know, thank you.