Tough Love - Chris Sturniolo

Treasure

Anastasia

I got back to my dorm later in the evening than I'd intended. We went to Ella's dorm and just chilled for a while, went on our phones, and talked about random shit in between our scrolling.

When I finally walked into my room, I felt the quiet and the stillness of it very suddenly, and a wash of loneliness came over me as I dropped my bag at the door. But then I thought of the conversation Chris and I had on the porch all those months ago, when I asked him about feeling lonely.

Even when you feel alone, you never really are. There's always someone out there thinking of you or caring about you.

I smiled at that memory. I was so angry at him just a few moments later, but I didn't look back at that day the same anymore. Instead I remembered his kindness and his warmth, and I was comforted in knowing that's all he's ever wanted to give to me, even if he was absolutely terrible at it for a while.

I stripped my clothes as I headed to the bathroom, turned the water as hot as I could stand it and stepped in. A few moments into washing my hair, I saw my phone light up on the bathroom counter. I was desperate to see if it was from Chris, which it probably was. I tried to enjoy the rest of my shower but my whole brain revolved around that phone.

When I finally stepped out, I grabbed my phone as soon as I was dry enough and of course, there was his name.

Chris: can i come over

I smiled down at my phone as I typed back, walking out of the bathroom.

Me: yeah come

I tossed my phone onto my bed and headed to my drawers, and my phone buzzed before I'd even made it there.

Chris: ok let me in

I snapped my head up, skipped to the door and yanked it open.

I was greeted by his beautiful smile, his hockey flow tamped down by a dark Red Sox beanie. His smile dropped in an instant and he shoved me inside as he looked both ways down the hall.

"Jesus woman, answering the door in a towel, anyone could see you," he chastised me, shoving the door closed behind him.

"Relax, there was no one out there," I rolled my eyes as I turned back to my drawers.

"There could have been," he came back with, heading to my bed and throwing himself into the pillows and blankets.

"I thought you'd be happy to see me in a little towel," I flirted, looking over my shoulder at him. He propped himself up against the headboard, one arm reaching up to rest his forearm behind his head.

"Oh I'm definitely happy," he laughed lightly, admiring me. His adoration always flattered me, and although I got looks from many guys, his never made me uncomfortable or nervous. In fact, it did the very opposite. I felt a surge of confidence with his eyes on me...I felt fucking perfect. Because he didn't just like what he saw, he also liked the parts of me he couldn't see.

"Should I make you even happier?" I teased, abandoning my quest for real clothes and slowly approaching the bed. I kneeled at the edge and crawled to him, his eyes on mine the whole time, his expression earnest as he adored me, not moving a muscle. I straddled his lap and adored him back. Something wild was happening between us and I knew he could feel it too.

He reached his hand out to stroke my cheek as we looked at each other. "I love you," he said quietly.

My heart jumped in my chest at his admission, and the insane part was...I already knew it was true.

"I know," I whispered. I wanted to say it back, I really did. But I was terrified and I didn't know how to do it. He didn't seem to mind and he smiled at me closed lipped as he moved his hand to my wet hair and stroked it gently between his fingers, looking all around my face, my neck, my arms.