rag doll | TWD

[36] crossed

knockin' on heaven's door --- guns n' roses

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[POV]

Daryl had come back to the group with the news that Beth was alive and at Grady Memorial Hospital. They'd been keeping her hostage, and now, they also had Carol. Noah, who'd escaped had come back with Daryl to join the group and help them get Beth back. 

It wasn't long after Daryl's return that he'd noticed a large chunk of the group was gone, most notably, JJ. Rick told him what went down, and that JJ had ultimately decided to leave with Abraham's posse to get Eugene to DC. 

Sasha was angrily cutting up the church pews for wood to board up the windows and door. 

"It's-uh, good you weren't here." Tyrese told Daryl, handing him the pipes from the organ. 

"She hanging in there?" 

Tyreese looked to his sister, answering honestly, "no."

Daryl carried the pipes to create stakes outside of the church doors. 

"You gonna take the cross too?" Gabriel questioned, hurting for his church that was being taken apart and basically used for scraps.

"If we need it." Daryl drove the pipe into the ground. He looked back up, noticing the blood painted letter on the side of the church. It made him think of JJ's palm that had a similar marking. It made him hope that she was okay, wherever she was. 

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[JJ]

Glenn and I stared out into the multitudes of walkers ahead in the road, trying to figure out our next move. 

"They've got no clue we're here." Glenn informed Tara. 

She screwed on one of the water bottle caps. "That's great news for JGREATM. In less great news for JGREATM, we just scraped the bottom of the water barrel."

"JGREATM?" I looked at the bottles.

"Just GREATM. Your name stands for the just part."

"Yeah, but what is the GREATM part?" Glenn questioned. 

"It's our group name. Solidarity. Band of brothers. JGREATM." Tara explained, "Thinking 'bout getting a tattoo on my knuckles."

"Bet it'd look good on a t-shirt." I commented, looking to Glenn's expression. "Sorry, it's just nice to think about something else instead of the shit show that is our lives."

"Yeah." 

Maggie and Rosita walked up. There wasn't anything new with Eugene. 

Glenn turned to Maggie, "Should we get him to the church?"

"Moving him could make him worse."

"What will make him better?" Rosita asked.

"Waking up." Maggie answered, "if he doesn't..."

I scoffed, shaking my head, "that's Just GREATM."

Glenn sighed, "did you really just say that?"

"What? That was clever." 

We looked over just in time to see Abraham swat his bottle of water out of Rosita's hands and stand up, threateningly. "Look at me!"

My gut reaction was to grab my gun from it's side holster, but Maggie was already on it. 

"Sit down or I'll put you down." 

JGREATM stood in a moment of tension before Abraham fell back to his knees. 

Tara shifted uncomfortably, "well, what's next on the agenda?"

"We need more water." Glenn stated. 

"There's a creek up the road." Rosita informed. "A few miles southwest of here."

"Y'all go." I looked to the group. "I'll stay here."

"You sure?" Maggie questioned. "I can stay too."

I nodded, "I'll be fine."

I sat on the side of the truck, looking between Abraham and Eugene. 

The heat got to be too much just sitting there. I couldn't imagine that it was helping Eugene in the slightest, so I got the ladder off the back of the truck, found a blanket under the seat and used the two to make a shade. I glared at Abraham as I did the heavy lifting. 

He didn't even look my way. I marched over to him. "Get over yourself. You're not the only one who lost something today." Abraham continued to stare into the distance. "I don't know you, you don't know me, but we've both been through shit...this shit. And we've both lost this." 

I looked back at Eugene's shade, growing tired of Abraham's inability to pay attention. So, I stood directly in his line of view. "Look, this whole time you have expected everyone here to give you the upmost respect when you have done nothing but bully us. We are hungry, we are thirsty, I have a damn concussion, so my head has constantly felt like my brains are melting. But none of us can say shit because you would pitch a damn temper tantrum." I found myself to be having a heated argument...with myself. 

"We lost the one hope that kept us going. But we didn't lose respect for you even after you pummeled Lying-ass Larry the Cable Guy over there. You need to find some ounce of fucking respect to give us before we all end up killing each other."

"So, look at my when I'm speaking to you!" I yelled. 

His head slowly turned towards me. I figured I had screwed up like Rosita had this morning.

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am." 

That's not what I was expecting. It honestly caught me off guard. "Thank you." I shrugged. 

"Feel better?" He deadpanned, looking back out in the distance. 

I calmly huffed, dropping to the ground and sitting cross-legged, "no."

"Why'd you leave if you didn't want to?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe I thought that it would take my mind off of things."

"You said I don't know you; you don't know me." Abraham quoted. "But I think we're a lot more alike than you might want to believe."

I looked to him, who had slightly relaxed from his kneeling position, "How so?"

"The whole reason for this, going to DC, I wanted to take my mind off things. My wife Ellen, kids, Becca and AJ." He shook his head, "Happened right before I met Eugene. That's the only reason I'm here."

"I'm sorry." I faced the direction he was. " I get it, though...not to that extent, but my freshman year. I got into selling drugs, living out of my car, I didn't have any family, my brother's best friend..." I gritted my teeth as I pulled the few weeds from the cracks in the concrete, "I ended up od'ing in my car one night in December. The homeless man who lived next to me told some store owner to call 911. I pulled through, but I didn't wanna be here."

"So, why're you here now?"

"Maggie, her family, my band. They made me wanna get clean, go back to my own family."

"That's how we're alike. You wanna keep going. Because when you stop..."

I finished the sentence for him, "you start to think that you'd be better off dead again." I slowly looked to Abraham. "Did you want Maggie to shoot you?"

"I thought I did." He answered, "But I didn't."

We heard a slight growling noise come from behind. Thinking it might be a walker, we pulled out guns. 

"He-hello?" 

Eugene. 

"Oh my-" I stood up, "Eugene."

a/n: so i know i published literally like three days ago, but it's sunday:) it's sort of a filler chapter anyways, but i rlly want jj & abraham to be pals, you know?