rag doll | TWD

[73] worth

full circle --- aerosmith

♮♮♮
[POV]

Aunt J, 
I remember waking up at the farmhouse to you arguing with Daryl. It was right after I'd been shot- I thought I was seeing things. But I had never been happier than when I realized I wasn't. Those years that I wasn't allowed to see you, I was angry at you. I didn't understand why you weren't around anymore. Why you never took me to the movies or came to my soccer games.

I kept thinking about what I would say to you if I ever saw you again. I had planned to completely blow up and use all the bad words you had taught me in the 3rd grade.

But I wasn't angry anymore. The way we talked, joked- it reminded me of how things used to be.

I want that for everyone. No more anger. No more fighting.

I wanted to kill Negan. I was going to that day I stowed away in the truck. That day- I saw the workers in there. They're just regular people, old people, young people, families... you saw them. 

You don't want them to die, Aunt J. Neither does my dad. 

We're so close to starting things over. Especially you and Daryl. It's that bigger world Jesus talked about- the Kingdom, the Hilltop.

My dad will listen to you. You should convince him to continue working towards the bigger world. Giving them a chance at life, bringing life into it- no more taking it out. 

Every life is worth something. 

Get it back to how it used to be... hiding frogs in teacher's desks and playing music and screaming at the top of your lungs in a closed room.

Be the fun Aunt JJ to Judith. Don't let Dad stop you from teaching her the funny bad words. Show her music (especially the songs Dad wouldn't approve of). Funny how all of the best memories were doing something Dad didn't like. 

I remember when Mom and Dad would get in arguments, we'd close the door to the upstairs office and blast music and just scream our heads off. 

Guess that's why you were the cool aunt.

Be that for Judith. She's gonna need it. She's gonna need the influence of Aunt J in her life. You made life fun. 

I wish I could see her grow up. I wish I could see you have your own family. 

Make sure to tell them about their older cousin. 

& tell my dad it's his turn to be the fun uncle. Although, his definition of a fun weekend was always watching Finding Bigfoot and River Monsters, so I'm sure you have nothing to worry about with him being a bad influence. 

You're strong. You've survived so much. You're going to survive so much more. You've got to.

P.S. You should give this to Carl Jr. (or whatever classic rock band inspired name you come up with) - oh, and sorry it's chipped 

JJ held the red- now chipped- guitar pick necklace between her fingers. Holding to it tightly as she hung it around her neck. 

It was what she and Carl had bet on back at the farmhouse. JJ never thought that he'd kept it this long- she hadn't thought about it since the day she gave it to him. 

She let out a heavy sigh, watching over the people of Hilltop working diligently. 

"Hey." Rick greeted. JJ looked up from the spot she had been sitting in, giving a soft smile to her brother. "You're feeling better."