In the spotlight

31

Sofia Christensen

I was standing in front of him, like someone who was not just completely deaf but completely mute as well. My heart was beating in my throat, and I was deafened by the blood that was beating against my eardrums.

Why was he here? Is he a guest for his sister's show? But that doesn't start until Sunday. And why didn't Isabella tell me this? He was supposed to be in Madrid, far enough away from me, with a safe distance between us.

No, I can't do this again. His bright green eyes were scanning my face curiously, seemingly as surprised as me. It was clear that he didn't know what to say either, and I didn't even know if I wanted him to speak. I couldn't decide if I wanted to slap him or run away from him, but at the moment, I only had the courage to do the last one.

Without any more time wasted, I turned the corner and approached the elevator again hastily.

"Sofia, can I..." I heard his voice from behind me. Can you? Can you do what? I felt anger building up in my body, but not in a million years would I have had the courage to turn back and face him again.

He went silent once again, letting me go freely. To where? Even I didn't know yet. I stepped into the cabin I had just left a few moments ago and started pushing the buttons frantically until the heavy doors finally slid together in front of me.

I sighed heavily, leaning my back against the cold metal. Anger, dread, and all kinds of different frustrations were mixing deep inside my body and my head. The fact that I didn't know the reasons why he showed up here was bothering me, and the fact that Isabella didn't even bother telling me that his brother would be here.

I've been through some of the darkest stuff in my life these past months, then finally started recovering, and when I almost thought that the light at the end of the tunnel was near, he crushed my illusions under me just like that.

I clenched my fists as I exited the cabin door, feeling as though tension almost took control of my mind. I spotted the large, light brown-colored oak doors at the end of the corridor, heading straight towards them. Without even bothering to knock on it first, I barged straight through it into the office.

"Jesus Christ, Sofia, what has happened?" Isabella snapped her head towards me as she trembled upon hearing the door open so suddenly. Her long brown hair fell before her shoulders, and the color ran out of her face once she saw the anger on mine.

"Do you have anything to inform me about?" I held her eye contact firmly but for a moment, it seemed as if she didn't even know what I was talking about. I was on the verge of tears at this point; seeing him again after such a long time like that and knowing that I've been played by Isabella like that was way too overwhelming to me right now.

"What happened? Are you okay?" She stood up from her office chair behind the mahogany desk and approached me, ignoring my previous question. She tried to place her hand on my shoulders as a form of showing support, but I shoved it away quickly.

"No, I'm not fucking okay." I tried to restrain my emotions as much as possible, but it started to get very hard. I was repeating my therapist's word in my head constantly and tried to take deep breaths, but none of it helped my situation at all.

"Shouldn't you at least warned me about it before?" I traced my eyes to meet hers, fixing the position of my large, framed glasses with my trembling hands. "Oh, Sofia, by the way, my brother, who dragged you through anorexia and almost ruined your career, will be here, just so you know. Why is he even here?" I slapped my hands on my outer thighs hopelessly.

"I've even accepted the fact that you put me in an opening position not even once, but twice after you knew perfectly well that I was coming back from a serious illness where one mistake could end my career. Without consulting me." I stepped one step closer to the woman, who was looking straight at me, listening to everything I had to say.

"And now you bring him here purposefully. As if you're trying to ruin me." My tone quieted down, but my jaw clenched angrily. Isabella waited patiently until I'd finished with everything I had to say before speaking up.

"No, that's not the case at all; just let me explain, alright?" She moved slowly around me, as if I could snap at her at any time. That was kind of the case, however. I leaned against her desk, trying desperately to hide my tears of anger away from her.

"First of all, ruining your career? Please, you're Sofia Christensen, who could ever ruin your career?" She looked at me incredulously, telling me this as if it were the world's clearest fact.

"Dior has been struggling to know when you're returning, and Versace has already offered a contract if you'd ever grow tired of the French." She scoffed at Versace's under-the-belt move, which I didn't know about at all. Not like this was the main thing I came here for anyway.

"As of Matteo..well." One of my eyebrows was raised upon waiting, pressuring her to come up with something as fast as possible because this conversation was getting a little uncomfortable.

"I wanted to talk to you in private right before our first meeting. I told him to stay put on his ass so he wouldn't ruin my plan with you, but he did exactly the opposite." She massaged her temples with her eyes closed. If it wasn't about his brother, I probably would've smiled a little.

"See, Sofia, I didn't really have any other choice. My other guy broke his knee, won't be available for a whole year, and Matteo was free for the whole week and convinceable." She put her hands on the table and leaned on them before sitting back on her office chair behind me.

"Isabella, with all due respect." I straightened up and turned toward her curious eyes. My tone was now all calm and quiet, and while I understood her motives, I couldn't have hated her decision more.

"If you make me walk or just shoot with him, I will give up modeling without a second thought and become the pilot I've studied for." I placed one of my hands in front of her, pointing straight at my contract under my index finger. And while this sounded like a drastic decision, I was ready to make it if I was forced to do something I didn't agree to.

"Don't worry, you won't do anything you don't want to." She tried to calm me down without doing something stupid. We were both perfectly aware of my importance here; even if I never liked to use my position as a tool to achieve anything, it was very influential in times like these.

"Thank you. Sorry about lashing out like that." I added to the end before I left the room, just out of pure courtesy. She was still my boss after all. So this is how we stand right now.

After three months of struggling and another one of recovery, the very thing I couldn't wait for to finally happen has started off like this. Why am I being such a dramatic bitch right now? Matteo is not even my ex; he was just a very poor decision in the past.

I am one of the most respected people in here. I do whatever I want, and I work however I want to. This building is 20 floors tall; somehow I will manage to avoid him; it shouldn't be that hard, right?

His goddamned beautiful eyes flashed in front of my eyes as I sat down in front of the meeting room. His hair got longer but suited him perfectly, while his muscles grew even larger, if I wasn't mistaken.

Out of the sudden anger that rushed through my veins in my body, I slapped my forehead with the palm of my hand. I hated him with every ounce of my body, yet as I was sitting here on a Monday morning, I couldn't stop thinking about his perfect self.

Fucking hell, why does he have to possess such control over my thoughts? I gulped loudly as I tried to get him out of my head, unsuccessfully.

This week is going to be a long one.