In the spotlight

24

Sofia Christensen

The cold breeze hit me in the face and got under my opened beige trench coat, forcing me to pull it closely together. The street lights illuminated the empty streets in front of me as I distanced myself from the building. The concrete was glistering from the ice that formed on it due to the minus-degree temperatures under the bald trees covering the side of the road. When the wind hit them, their branches looked like a thousand black snakes sliding away before the black sky.

"Sofia wait!" I heard my name being called from the entrance of the building where I just came from. I turned around quickly, spotting Xavier jogging towards me.

"Can I walk with you until your apartment?" He asked in a very polite tone once he reached my side. He ran through his thick brown hair before sliding his hand back into the coat's pockets.

"Sure." I nodded emotionlessly. We walked a few streets in complete silence next to each other. The silence wasn't too awkward, but we both could feel the need to talk about the things that had been left unsaid.

But on the other hand, I wasn't feeling very talkative today. Or on any other day, truth be told. This is how we spent our weeks during the past few months. I attended one or two photoshoots a week with either Xavier or Adriana, whoever happened to be in Paris at the time. I haven't left the French capital since finishing my first-ever Victoria's Secret Fashion Show in Los Angeles in early January.

My parents have visited me twice since then because I had no energy to travel to Norway whatsoever, and I am very grateful for them to travel here instead. This lack of energy got so out of hand that I had to cancel other opportunities as well, one in Seoul and one in Bangkok, and stay in France instead, but no matter how much I rested, I just felt even worse after.

At this point, the only request I was willing to accept was from Dior, and only because they hired me for the spring Paris fashion week as their opening runway model. If I started canceling their shoots, then I could say goodbye to the fashion week all together.

"So uhh.. I heard that you are not coming to New York with us next week." Xavier broke the silence that was occasionally only broken when a car rode past us on the road. We turned right into a smaller street, and I unzipped my bag on my back, looking for my keys.

"Yeah, I can't." I mumbled quietly under my breath as I pressed the little blue plastic on the intercom's screen, hearing the buzzing sound of the door opening in front of us.

"Are you sure, though? Maybe I can still get you back on board." He scratched the back of his head at a loss. We were on thin ice now, and he was well aware of that, and annoyance was already creeping up on my back.

"I'm sorry, Xavier, but I don't feel good enough, neither mentally nor physically, for a trip to New York now." I sighed heavily as we both entered the elevator. I just couldn't wait until I could finally fall into bed in my room.

"You haven't been feeling well for weeks now; are you sure you're alright?" He was eyeing me worryingly. "I can accompany you to the doctor's office anytime; you just have to call me." I expected him to annoy me even further, but his worry somehow warmed my heart and made me sad at the same time.

"Thank you, really. I think I just need to rest a little." A weak smile formed on my face as I opened my entrance door and turned back from my living room. I reassured him that I would call him if I needed any assistance, before quickly exchanging a hug and closing the door behind him.

I honestly hated the idea of people worrying about me or feeling sorry for me. I sighed heavily once I threw my stuff on the floor right in front of the door and headed upstairs to my room.