Burn Into Me (Into Me Series Book Two)

Chapter Two - Kingdom

Jackson's POV

I can't get her out of my head.

Which, let's be honest, isn't anything new but the reasoning is completely different than what it usually is.

The way her eyes completely shifted from hope to pain. The way I could tell she was instantly beating herself up over it, blaming herself. The way she cried when she finally let it all come crashing down over her. The way she tore herself to pieces so easily and reduced herself to nothing, claiming that she was a disappointment and that I deserve more.

How do I make her understand that she is fucking everything to me?

A shockwave of pain comes from my left side, running to my spine and across my back. I groan, coming back to the present. Nyx throws another punch, which I block this time now that I'm actually paying attention. I throw a hook which they block, moving so fast that they manage to land two more hits before I can fully process what the fuck is happening. They kick my sternum with their foot, sending me flying onto my back with a grunt. They keep their foot on my chest, holding me down as they pant, a smile spreading across their face.

"Well, damn," I breathe, trying to ignore the ache in my chest.
"Sorry about that, boss," they say, removing their foot from my chest.
"Never thought I would see the day where someone would be able to kick Jackson's ass," Riley jokes, reaching a hand out to me to help me to my feet.
"Shut the fuck up, kid," I grumble at him, rolling my eyes as I stand up. "I wasn't paying attention. I was thinking about stuff."
"Hey, I'm not a kid anymore," he quips.
"I guess you have a point," I shrug. I turn to look at Nyx, "Go spar with Killian." They nod, their bright blue eyes glancing around the room. They spot him and jog off toward him, their long black hair tied up moving in waves.

"You okay, man?" Riley asks me, cocking his eyebrow at me.
"Yeah..." I drag, rubbing my face with my hands, "Just a rough morning."
"Something happened with Jet?" he wonders.
"Sorta? She took another pregnancy test this morning and it was negative again," I explain, starting to walk toward the exit of the training room as I pull the wraps off of my hands.
Riley follows me, "Damn man, I'm sorry."
"It's fine, I'm fine with it," I shrug. "I just wish she was. Every time we get another negative test, a little bit more of her dies, I swear." We walk out into the hallway, entering the locker room reserved for leadership.
"So it's been, what, ten months?" he clarifies.
"Yeah. And I honestly don't even care that it's been almost a year. It's gonna happen when it's gonna happen. But every time that second line doesn't show up, I watch Jet tear herself down to nothing and hate herself a little bit more, and that kills me. I can't watch her hate herself." I open my locker, grabbing the hangers with my suit.
"I know you want to help her, Jackson, but this is something that Jet has to figure out for Jet," he starts, grabbing his suit and slamming his locker next to mine shut. We walk towards the showers, stepping into our own stalls and stripping down as the water warms up.

"What do you mean?" I ask, stepping under the warm stream of water and letting it wash away the tension in my shoulders.
"I mean that Jet is a very stubborn woman," Riley laughs.
"Yeah, you got that fuckin' right," I chuckle, shaking my head. Not like Riley could see it.
"So, she has to make conclusions herself and come to decisions on her own. She's hyper-independent," he lectures.
"I know she is, doesn't mean I have to like it," I sigh, grabbing a handful of shampoo and working it into my hair. "I just wish she would let me take care of her."
"She can't. Her dad forced her to become an adult at, like, 7 or something. She's been on her own for her whole life."
"Not for the past two and a half years," I counter, washing the shampoo out and adding in conditioner (yes I still use it).
"True, but how long did it take her to open up to you and truly let you in?"

Alright. He's got me there.

In my defense, you could say the same exact thing about me.

... that's not helping, is it?