I feel sad for what I wrote and reminded him.
I’m sad because I know very well that I can’t give to anyone else what I gave to him..
I gave him everything to the extent that I had nothing left to offer to others..
Now I totally understand why I’m afraid of love..
Love is not for me,I can’t take it,it’s just full of disappointment and pain..
Even if we were together,I couldn’t keep on..
He taught me how to express my feelings in writing, but now I can’t write a single letter..
He was the first person who made me cry for someone,but you know what?
I haven’t been able to cry until now,I’m trying so hard because I really need it but no,it’s not happening..
Made me think I could trust him,do you know how big this is?
I got tougher than before,it made me a better person but when he left,he made me worse..
Actually,he never came to go..
Isn’t it funny?
No one can fix what’s broken inside me,not even me..
The idea of living in a lie that he loved me is really hard..
I wish I loved him without the illusion that he loves me..
Because if that was the case, it couldn’t be as difficult as it is now..
I was saying, “Looks don’t lie”,
I thought I could read him..
But now I’m saying it,even eyes lie..
And I realized something important..
We only hate our fears,we can’t hate anything else..
We don’t hate people if we don’t fear them..
It’s one thing to hate fear, it’s quite another to be afraid of hate..
And I hate the lie because I’m afraid of it.
Person’s fears are his true personality, that’s why lying is me..
It will still follow me and I will believe it even if I hate it..
Despite the signs that he doesn’t love me, my love for him has blinded me..
Now I understand why I couldn’t hate him..
It wasn’t because I loved him, but because I wasn’t afraid of him..
He was the only person I looked up to and said, “He loves me, he wouldn’t lie”..
I’ve never seen in him a lie like the others, except that it was my biggest lie..
And it hurts me, it hurts so bad..
-Regret-
*A message sent to a friend after realizing the truth
YOU ARE READING
★Jupiter From Afar★
PoesíaSome things are not destined to reach their owner.. To remain stuck in one's soul like a slow-killing poison.. In order to save themselves,they must free them.. And here,we witness the tip of the pens from a story whose favorite place was "distances...
