"A Twist of Fate" follows Yn, a 22 year old Brazilian with battles against bipolar disorder, a deafening history of self-harm, and an on and off struggle with an eating disorder, Yn's journey of love, friendship, and self-discovery unfolds in unexpe...
Two months had passed since that unforgettable sleepover that left my heart racing and my mind completely confused. As the days turned into weeks and the weeks into months, my feelings for Billie had only intensified. The more time we spent together, the deeper I fell for her. But with each passing day, I grew more and more terrified of the emotions that were consuming me.
My brain decided that it was best to create distance between us. It wasn't because I didn't want to be close to her; quite the opposite. I was afraid of how much I wanted her, of how real my feelings were becoming. I panicked at the thought of losing control, of getting hurt again, so my mind resorted to self sabotage.
In the midst of my emotional chaos, my career at Waldorf Media's Agency and my studies at college became my refuge. I threw myself into work and academics, trying to drown out the feelings that were threatening to overwhelm me. I kept myself busy, always on the move, attending parties, drinking, doing basically all the drugs I could and cutting myself even more frequently. I was a mess, completely manic, pushing me to seek thrill after thrill, to forget the tangled emotions I couldn't escape.
As my manic episode continued, I distanced myself from my friends, including Olivia, Conan, and even Billie. We had made a group chat after the sleepover, but I found myself sending thousands of texts only during the few times I felt like talking. My friends were concerned about my behavior, but I pushed them away, hiding behind the cool party girl I was pretending to be.
Billie, unaware of the inner battles I was facing, tried to reach out and check in on me. But I replied sporadically, never letting her see the full extent of my struggle. She deserved more than my erratic and distant behavior, and I was determined to keep her away to avoid causing any harm.
My world had become a constant rollercoaster I was riding alone. The truth was, I missed Billie terribly, and each day without her felt like a gaping hole in my heart. But I was afraid of the depth of my feelings, afraid of allowing myself to be vulnerable and open to the possibility of getting hurt.
Yet, even in the midst of my chaotic lifestyle, I found moments where thoughts of her would consume me. In the dead of night, when the partying had ceased and the world was quiet, I would lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, my heart aching for her. I would think back to our moments at the sleepover, the way she looked at me, the way she made me feel, and it was both a comfort and a torment.
But despite my best efforts to push her away, I couldn't erase her from my mind. Billie had become an indelible part of my life, and her absence only magnified my yearning for her. I was torn between the desire to hold her close and the fear of letting her in.
Then, the night of the important dinner reunion arrived, and my focus shifted once again. I received a text from Billie, just those simple words, and a rush of emotions flooded over me.
Billie Eilish -Hi. -Can we meet up later?
My heart pounded in my chest, torn between my longing for her and my determination to maintain distance.
I quickly typed a reply, "Sorry, can't. I have a work thing," and hit send. As I looked at the message, my heart ached even more. I wanted to see her, to be close to her, but my fear held me back.
With a sigh, I started getting ready for the dinner. I picked an outfit that was professional yet versatile, allowing me to transition from the dinner to a potential night out at the club. It was a front I had perfected, juggling work, parties, and my own inner confussion.
(Yn's outfit)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
As I arrived at the venue, I spotted Lily waiting for me in her "girl boss" outfit, exuding confidence and power. I felt a mix of excitement and nerves, knowing the significance of this moment for my career. We talked, and she explained the details of the new project, a mix of enthusiasm and professionalism in her voice.
"So basically what you'll have to do is take over the social media, take the photos, videos, and edit and all that," Lily explained, her words sparking a sense of purpose within me. "It's a lot, but you'll not be by yourself. You'll just run the team, and there will be a whole team working for you. You'll have to go with them on tours, though, and I know about your college commitments. That's a detail we'll have to go through eventually."
My heart swelled with excitement, this opportunity was like a dream come true. It was a chance to prove myself in the field I was passionate about. "But who will I be working for, who are these singers?" I asked, eager to know more about the artists I would be collaborating with.
As Lily was about to answer, a voice cut through the air, interrupting our conversation. "Hi, Lily!" My heart skipped a beat. I turned to see Maggie, Finneas, Patrick, and then, the one person I hadn't expected to see, the last person I wanted to see, Billie.
