Kyle Atop Mount Silverheels

The Beast

"PASS THE DUTCHIE 'PON THE LEFT HAND SIDE!"

"Pass the dutchie 'pon the left hand side," Stan hesitantly replied, folding a taco.

"It go a bun!" Randy flipped pork.

"Gimme the music make me jump and prance!"

"It a go dung."

"Gimme the music—"

"Jah know"

"Make me rockin' at the dance"

"It was a cool and lonely breezy afternoon!" Randy did hip circles.

Stan laughed.
"How does it feel when you got no food?!"

"And you could feel it cause it was the month of June!" Randy turned up the music.

"How does it feel when you got no food?!" Stan smiled and yelled over the music.

Stan and Randy danced to the beat as they kept the tacos coming like an assembly line.

"Aww man... I gotta take a break!" Stan turned the music down and then off.

Stan reached for his phone and jerked at the missing calls from Kyle.

He tried to call back to.... No answer.

Stan texted Kyle. "Is everything alright or did you butt dial me?" And then went back to work.

The call gnawed at him. It must've been pretty serious if he was calling.
Stan continued folding his pork tacos.

"Hey, dad, could I take a break outside?"

"No more than twenty minutes, Stan. We've gotta keep em' coming."

"Alright, alright, I know, dad," Stan grabbed his coat and walked outside.
He shivered.
He started to walk—no—run to Kyle's house.

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Kyle woke up in his bed with his blanket draped over his face. He moved it to find that his room was clean and his Terrance and Philip dolls were facing him—or facing each other more of, all gay-like on his bed.
He hopped up and walked over to his parent's doorway in the hall, peering through he could only see none other than Gerald Broflovski snoring like a hog and no one else.
He looked so...defeated.

The house hung heavy with a silent and ambivalent atmosphere, with the gray sky curiously peeking through the windows as if it were witnessing something it wasn't supposed to.
Kyle peered into Ike's doorway; Ike was in his room sound asleep, too.
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Kyle heard the door ring. His blood ran cold.

Kyle opened the door.

"Kyle, are you ok?"

"WOAH! Stan, what is your deal?"

"What?"

"You're naked!"

Stan looked down at his tighty whities and pulled his coat over.
"No I'm not!"

"Yes you are! You've got your cajones all out in the open!"

"Ok, yeah but...listen, when I saw your call I came right away because I was worried about you."

"Stan, I called you, like, hours ago."

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"I came all the way over in my undies and my coat for YOU!"

Kyle chuckled. "Ok, ok, jeez..."
"I knew you were busy with the beef but why haven't you answered me?"

"Because my dad—"

Randy pulled up in only an apron.
"STAN!"

"My dad doesn't let me have a break for more than 20 minutes and my poor fingers are sore from folding—"

"STAN!"

"Coming, Dad!"
"Tell me, is everything alright, Kyle?"

Kyle feigned a smile. "Yeah."

"You sure?"

Kyle stifled a laugh. "Uh huh!"

"Alright, just let me know if you need anything, ok?"

Kyle was holding back tears as Stan left.
Not just because he missed his super best friend but because his underwear had a hole just right for his crack.

Kyle backed into his house and shut the door.
How did they not get hypothermia being naked and stuff like that?
How did Stan's ass not get hypothermia from that little window there?
He had... questions.
Questions that would have to wait for another day because he was still so tired and cold.
Kyle tucked himself back into bed.

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January 4th.

"Why do I have to swab all the way up there? It makes me wanna die."

"It's a Covid test, Kyle," Gerald turned his magazine.

"But I don't have Covid."

"'Still have to take it."

Kyle frowned.
He took the swab and rubbed it on the test, then added three drops of the solution.
Kyle's liquid boogers bubbled.

Negative.

"Alright, now we're gonna have you fill out these forms."
Kyle was given a small laptop and he signed some forms using the touch screen.
Nothing particularly worrying other than the sheer amount of boxes he had to check off as "none" because he didn't struggle with body image.
He signed a paper at the front and then sat in the waiting room.
The chairs were green and the walls were, too.
There was an abstract artwork made out of colorful string on the wall and the outside of the office was empty, desolate, and quiet enough that he nicknamed it "The Backrooms."
As he was waiting for his parents to finish their forms, a girl walked in and sat on one of the green couches.
Brown hair, brown eyes, magenta beanie with a flower and ohmygoshitsHeidi.
She squinted at him with a narrowed, feline-like gaze. Kyle froze.
Kyle had a crush on Heidi a while back but things got complicated when she became Cartman's girlfriend and well, became like a girl Cartman—Cartwoman.
And judging by her mannerisms, she was still just as crass-in-your-ass as ever.

"Hey, Kyle, what's going on," Heidi casually stretched herself on the couch.

"I...uh.."

"I'm not surprised you're here."

Kyle returned her feline-like gaze.

"You're afraid of the beast," Heidi gestured by wiggling her arms at beast.

"Well, I'm not sure what beast you're talking about," Kyle did wiggle arms too.

Heidi whispered. "The fat one."

"No, no, no... You're not getting it. I—"

"I stopped eating because I didn't want to be like Cartman again, but... I took it too far," Heidi teared up just a bit before viciously wiping at her eyes.
"But you... I didn't know that you had a beast too."

"Heidi, I don't have a beast."

"That's what they all say..." wiggle arms.

"Kyle Broflovski!"

"Coming!"

Kyle made his way towards the back.
There were small lockers for keeping as-needed medicine and the rest was along just one short hall. Impossible to get lost in and man... kinda cramped.
He was led down the hall and into one of the identical rooms.

There sat his TEAM.

"What's the Kyle, problem?"
"FUCK!"
"What's the problem, Kyle?"

Kyle looked at the floor for what felt like a long time and fidgeted with his gloves.
"When I was younger... I had trouble eating because I got so anxious and so my mom she..." Kyle's voice trailed off as he silently started to cry.

"ARFID." "Yeah, ARFID."

"Huh?"