Stoupající

9

I am not falling for Eric.

Do I like him? Absolutely. The side of him that he shows me whenever it is just the two of us is rather likable. He is good at listening, giving advice and calling you out on your bullshit.

Do I think he looks attractive? Of course. I would have to be blind not to see that. He is probably the most handsome guy in Dauntless.

Do I like the way he touches me? I guess so. Despite my Abnegation upbringing I rather like feeling his hands on me during training or when he leads me to my seat. Why? Simple – it feels reassuring.

Do I come to him whenever I am in trouble nowadays? Yup. Because he is my boss, obviously.

Could I ever fall in love with him? No fucking way. He is the enemy. He is working with Jeanine and convinced that Divergents should be eliminated. That I should be eliminated.

And despite what Uriah thinks Eric is not in love with me either.

Does he like me? Yes. We have managed to develop some kind of friendship and he trusts me quite a lot.

Does he think I am attractive? Probably, judging by what I could feel when he had me pinned against the wall yesterday.

Is he always the one saving me whenever I have gotten myself into trouble again? Unfortunately, yes. But, as he so eloquently put it himself, only because my death would cause him a lot of paperwork.

But the most obvious reason for Eric not being in love with me is that he is trying to sleep with every woman in Chicago.

My thoughts are interrupted by the person in question stepping into my path.

"Have you gone deaf, Stiff?" he snaps angrily. "I've been yelling at you for a full minute that you are done running laps."

I blink in confusion, breathing heavily. My left side is stitching.

"Hello? I'm still talking to you!"

"Sorry," I pant before wiping my hand across my sweaty forehead.

"Go grab your knives," he snaps, obviously irritated by my behavior. "Target practice."

I nod and make my way over to the table with the throwing knives.

Ever since the meeting with Max this morning Eric is pissed.

Max has been furious, to say the least. He has been yelling and cursing at Zeke and Four and the rest of the control room team for two hours straight, demanding how it was even possible for factionless to hack into our security system and shut it off. Unfortunately, they could not provide him with an answer.

So Max kept screaming about what could have happened if the intruders had gotten their hands on our weapons. And to make it all worse he snapped at Eric how irresponsible it had been of him to not only face the factionless without waiting for Uriah and his team but to also take me with him.

"Will you fucking focus now?" Eric bellows into my ear and I jump, missing the target completely.

"Now that was pathetic," he smirks and I freeze. His tone is exactly the same he used on Al back then. Al – who attacked me and helped Peter try to kill me. Who was now dead because I could not forgive him.

"You know what?" I hiss and whirl around. "Why don't you go and find someone else to take it out on? It's not my fault Max is mad at you."

"Not your fault?" he gapes at me in disbelief. "Who else's fault would it be then? I told you to go back to your apartment but you just couldn't fucking follow my orders, as always! Whatever I tell you to do, you do the exact opposite."