Useless Struggle!

Once again ...

When I woke up again, I felt as if I was in my worst nightmare. I just wanted to die and yet here I was once again. Oh how I wanted to scream and punch anyone who would come into my view. Come to think about it, I was on an island and I could just see some treas as I was laying down on the ground.

Me: FUCK!

I quickly sat up and looked around to see two people looking at me where one was coming closer. It was the same man I might have saved earlier and then another one. A woman was there looking at me.

Me: I am glad you made it.

???: I wish I could say the same for you.

Me: Huh?

???: What my brother means to say... it was foolish to just jump and float while being surrounded by whales.

Me: Ah.... well it would help me.

???: Help you?

Me: Yes. I told you earlier well your brother that if I helped him, he should help me.

???: It seems only fair.

???: You saved me, of course I wll help you.

Me: Great, then kill me.

The moment I said that they looked astonished that I could even suggest something like that but it was my greatest wish to die and no matter how I was thinking about it, I just wanted to let everything end already.

???: I am Paseto, that is my sister Witira.

Me: I am Cale.

Paseto: Just Cale or?

Me: *sigh* Cale Henituse at your service.... now get it over with and kill me.

They seemed more and more confused what is going on. After all I was dressed like a noble, talk like a noble and am an asshole as well. Anything more I had to actually say? It was worth dying and it was certainly worth for them to kill me. Do they need a reason or do they think I lost it? Who knows.... who knows... but this would be my ticket to the afterlife for sure.

Paseto: This can't be your wish... you can't be serious.

Witira: Wow... this is a first.

Me: Well make this your last.

Witira: Why do you want to die?

Me: Why not?

Witira: Isn't live a gift?

Me: Life is not just a gift but death is as well.

Witira: Why do you want to die this badly?

Paseto: I can't believe a human is saying that...

Me: Believe it becauseif you won't help me, I will somehow manage to do it on my own.

Paseto: Is this how you found me?

Me: Miscalculated and survived... I should have drowned.

Witira: You do know that drowning is one of the most painful way to die, right?

Me: *sigh* It sounded like it was a peacful death.

Paseto: Oh no...

Me: It was one well besides the burning pain in my lungs.

Witira: I can't believe you are this stupid.

Me: Call me stupid or anything.... just get it over with.

Witira: No.

Paseto: There has to be another way!

Me: *sigh*

I let out a sigh and lied back down. About right now, I wanted to scream more and actually also throw a childish fit but that was certainly not something I could do right now. 

Paseto: We should get him back to where he belongs?

Witira: As if they could keep him from actually dying. He will certainly try it again.

Paseto: We owe it to him! He saved my life!

Witira: I know that brother.

They were arguing a bit but it seemed as if it was solved pretty quickly as well.

Paseto: Sowe go with him! 

Witira: *sigh* We can't just do that.

Paseto: We can and he needs it. I am sure father would understand.

Witira: True... true.... besides we could only save you because we found you in time. Don't do that again Paseto.

Paseto: I won't.

Apparently it was enough for them to decided to get me back to where I belonged but that was solely without my opinion. I didn't wanted anything to do with my life ever again. After all my life didn't belong to me! I couldn't just go back and tell them why I jumped. No one would believe me! It is ridiculous to say I am not my own and this body didn't belong to me. I was just holding on for soo soo long.

Me: TSK!

Paseto: What's wrong Cale?

Witira: Come to think about it... why did you want to die?