I'm standing at a cliff. The ocean stretching behind the cliff, painting the view dark blue. Intimating, wild and unpredictable.
The waves crash against the rocks in an attempt to move them. Battling for power. Trying to win over.
How would it feel to just... fall?
To slither between down the air.
Would I bleed out on the rocks? Would the waves catch me and take me with them?
Would I drown or would I crack?
Perhaps both.
Both feelings are constant thoughts in my mind.
I take a step closer towards the end of the cliff.
The wind is stronger now, pulling and tugging on my hair.
I look out to the endless ocean ahead of me. Sparkling blue. So intimidating and beautiful at the same time, it makes my heart ache. So welcoming and terrifying at the same time.
I avoid looking at the rocks below now, deciding that the view of the ocean gives me more peace. Allows me to part easier. Who would await me on the other side?
"MOMMY!", suddenly shrills through the air.
And I halt.
"Mommy, don't leave me!", a sob breaks through and I turn around.
Sitting amongst the grass is a little girl with red hair and blue eyes like mine. She is bawling her eyes out, trying to reach me. Her cheeks are flushed, wet streaks coating them. "MOMMY!", she screams once more, her sobs and desperate cries shattering my insides. I rush towards her, towards the little girl.
Just when my hand was about to hold hers, just when I was about to hug her-
She vanishes.
And I jerk up.
"Hey, are you okay?", Chris asked me, his hand rubbing my arm.
"I-where-", I mumbled out, utterly confused as I looked around the dark room.
"You had a nightmare, I believe. You kept on moving", he explained with a sleepy voice. His eyes were only half awake but concerned enough as they watched me.
"I... I must have. I don't remember anything", I lied and ran my hand through my hair. Chris gave me another lookover but said nothing. "Let's go back to sleep, you probably have a long day tomorrow", I looked over at him and he held my gaze before he nodded. "Come here?", he opened his arms and I instantly snuggled into him, letting his bare chest calm my nerves down.
Hoping I'd never dream of this again.
I was wrong.
It was all I was dreaming about for the next few days.
Chris spent more time at the office, saying that the work was piling up and they were running out of time. But he never told me any information about the body they had found.
"It's a classified case, I can't tell you about it"
Which was a good thing, right?
If I had been a suspect in the murder of Yarrow, they would have brought me in for interrogation. Or if it was connected to the Peal, they would have asked me to get any sort of information out.
As they had not done any sort of nor did Chris seek any information out of me, the murder must be a separate case from what they had been working on for the past months. The world didn't have to revolve around me and it was better that way.
While I was lost in my thoughts as I clicked through the different TV channels, it dawned on me one more time that I agreed to marry Christopher. It sounded so simple yet so impossible at the same time.
I am going to marry the investigator King was keen on getting rid of. They wanted to lure King out, I wanted to get rid of King. So similar yet vastly different goals.
If I wanted to save Chris, I needed to get rid of King and the whole of the organization.
