It's not like I can't see Harry, that's not why I cried. It was more of a sense of discomfort, he admitted he loved me, and now he misses me. So many emotions are flowing through me I can't even remember to blink constantly. This man does so many things to me. He can make the saddest person, yet he can also make me love everything about life.
Do best friends do that?
My tears continue to spill as my eyes get heavier and heavier. A pair of arms sweep me up and put me on the couch. Luke looks at me.
"Brooke. Why couldn't you talk to harry?"
My tears fall but I'm no longer sobbing. "I don't know. It's like I'm scared."
"You're scared of harry?"
"Emotionally. Physically, no. He'd never hurt me." I say.
"Why do you always defend him?"
My head hangs low and I sniffle, playing with my fingers, "I defend everyone."
"Defend yourself."
"I have nothing to defend." I say. He grabs me by the arm and pulls me up, he runs me into my room and puts me in front of my mirror.
"What is this?" He points.
"My mirror?"
"What's in the mirror?"
"My reflection."
"Specifically..."
"Me." I sigh.
"Defend your mind, body, and spirit."
~
~
My teacher passes me my test. 56%. Another F.
Seriously what is going on with math? I thought I was doing so well with this. After the bell rung I scurried down to the lunch room. Along the way I pass Lauren with her group of friends and we exchange smiles, soon enough I'm in the cafeteria. Alison sees me running and takes the paper from my hand.
"Another failed test? Brooke, what's going on?" She asks, concerned.
"I don't even know." I say rubbing my temples.
"Is harry consuming your mind?"
"Would it be bad if I said yes?"
"Not at all." She smiles. "That is your best friend and that was your first big fight. Really big. But you'll get past it, remember when we didn't talk for a month after the prank?"
"Right. But we didn't talk for three months Alison."
"And you will get past it." She rubs my shoulder. "Just relax."
~
~
I sit at the bar, tired, stressed, and overwhelmed.
"It was so busy today." I groan.
"I know." Luke says washing dishes. "But hey, your paycheck will be amazing."
Abby comes out of the bathroom and sits next to me.
"How's my brooke?"
"Tired. How's my Abby?" I laugh.
"Abby is very thirsty." She says looking at Luke.
"You're not a guest at the diner anymore." He laughs.
"I'm a paying customer."
"Bullshit, you sit in the same spot until our shifts are over."
"Fine, I'll get my own soda." She says walking behind the bar. My phone vibrates and Without checking caller ID I answer the call.
"Hello?" I yawn.
"Hi love."
"Harry..?" I gawk causing Abby and Luke to look over at me.
"Yeah. God I missed your voice."
"It's been a week."
"And before that, three months."
"What's up?"
"It's not another girl. I promise... Okay no but there is this one girl who I like but I won't make it a big deal. How've you been?"
"Stressed. I think I'm failing math." I say small.
"Seriously? That blows."
"No kidding."
He's silent for a bit, only small breathing. "I miss you brooke."
I bit my lip. "Then come see me."
"I'm afraid of screwing up again."
"..that's why you haven't called in a while?"
"I promised I'd never hurt you, but I did. I can't forgive myself."
"But I miss you too..."
The call is silent, I can still feel Abby and Luke's eyes on me.
"How's this," he speaks up. "Give me a month to prepare myself. In exactly a month I'll come to you, promise." He says.
"Exactly a months time?"
"Exactly."
"Okay." I smile. "See you then Harold."
"Until then cookie."
I remove the phone from my ear and before I can press end,
"Brooke! Wait!" He screams
"What?"
"I... I love you okay?"
"I love you too." I say without hesitation. With that, I end the call.
