Song of the chapter: Guardian Angel (Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)
My alarm goes off at 5:45. Immediately I sigh and flip over, turning my alarm off.
Today's the day
Today is a year since I lost my mother. The day I've been dreading is here. I slump out of my bed and walk over to my dresser to put my contacts in. Once that is done I put on my usual makeup, eyeliner and mascara. I change into my lazy clothes and go into the bathroom to freshen up. After eating a small breakfast, I'm out the door.
The sky is dark and grey, rain pouring out of it like someone left their sink to overflow. My dad and I get out of our car and meet with my other family. We all hug and exchange welcomes. With one nod, we all head over to the tombstone. In this moment the rain lightens and eventually stops.
We are all silent. Everyone is looking down at the little stone with my mothers name on it.
"Hi pen." My dad says.
I look up at the sky to try and hold back tears but it's no use. I look down and let the tears spill, I'm silent.
"We miss you." My aunt speaks up.
"Everyday."
"All day."
At this point I'm emotionless and drained. I hate seeing her in this state. My family talks about memories with her, while I stand silent, tears flowing, still looking at the stone. It feels just like yesterday I was at the hospital, like I just got the call at the dance studio. I close my eyes and let the memories flow. Every good memory we've ever had, replaying. My phone interrupts my thoughts by vibrating.
FROM ABBY: I just wanted you to know I love you so much and I'm always here.
I smile at the message but don't have a heart to respond. I check the time, 8:10. I'm going to be late to dance, luckily for me my family starts to say goodbye to each other.
"We miss you penny." My cousin says.
After that, we all walk away. I look up at the sky one last time while walking over to the car.
"Guys! Look!" I say smiling.
In the sky, there is a rainbow, bright and vibrant. My family gasps and talks amongst themselves. I smile. "Hi mama."
I walk into the studio and I'm immediately mauled by hugs. I smile as they pull away. Realization hits me and I loose my smile.
"What's wrong?" Abby asks.
I play with my fingers and bit my cheek. "I never saw harry today."
HARRYS P.O.V
"Am I done now sir?" I ask the old man.
"I still see some spots you've missed." He responds coldly.
"Sir, with all due respect, I've fixed your car up, and now I'm washing it. I have to meet my friend now, she needs me."
"I haven't heard your phone go off once."
With that my phone rings. I answer it.
"Harry, you need to come to the studio. Now."
"Abby, what's wrong."
"It's brooke."
I hang up immediately. "Sorry sir, I've got someone more important who needs me. Now." I say shoving the sponge into him.
I speed my car into the parking lot and quickly get out of it. I run up the ramp and into the studio doors. I look around and see brooke on the floor, sobbing.
"Harry." Abby says grabbing my arm. "She won't respond to anyone but you." She says sadly.
I kneel down and try to get her to talk "Brooke, listen to me. What's wrong?"
She doesn't respond, instead cries harder.
"Brooke, it's harry, it's me, I'm here, I didn't leave you, but I need to know, is this stress or anxiety?"
"Why does it matter?" Abby asks.
"Because." I say looking at her. "If it's an anxiety attack she won't get off the floor. Stress causes breakdowns like this, but she'll let someone take her somewhere. If it's anxiety she won't let anyone move her, let alone touch her." I look back at brooke. "Stress, or anxiety?" I repeat.
She breathes quick and let's out a small whimper. I look at her and try picking her up, she let's me. "Stress." I say carrying her bridal style and lifting her up.
"There are couches in the waiting room." Abby says. She guides me in the room and shuts the door so it's only us there in the room. I walk her over to the couch and set her down.
"D-don't leave me." She sobs.
"Never." I say, laying down with her. I lay on my side, as does she and she cries into my chest. She grabs my shirt and cries harder.
"Harry..?" She asks, as if making sure it's me.
"I'm here." I pet her back. I look up at Abby.
"Rub her forehead." She mouths.
"Why?" I mouth backs.
"Mom used to do it, calms her down."
Without second guessing, I caress her forehead, her instantly calming down a bit, I continue to do so. She eventually calms down to where it's only a couple sobs every minute.
I hate seeing her like this. She's such a strong person I hate seeing her hit her breaking point, she doesn't deserve this.
"Harry."
I look up to see Abby with her arms crossed.
"Look. She loves you okay? She wanted you, not Celeste, not me, you. You calmed her down." She shakes her head, looking down. "I underestimated you, I guess. You care for her. Obviously." She looks back at me. "Take her home Harry. Cuddle her to sleep. You said you don't like being alone? I know she doesn't either, especially at a time like this. Don't leave her, be there for her when she wakes up."
I sigh and look down at brooke, falling asleep, with her face nuzzled into my chest. "I'd never leave her." She lets out one last sob. "I love her too much."
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A/N okay so if you don't know already I write off of personal experiences and I felt like I needed to share this. So a year ago yesterday I actually did loose my own mother which inspired this chapter and the last flashback. Thanks for letting me write about it loves, I love you all so much 😘
-BB
