Kpop sickfics (requests open)

Seventeen scoups - mental health

This one was requested, I'm sorry if you don't like it :)

Lately I haven't been feeling like myself. I'm tired and numb. Don't get me wrong, I have a good life but right now I feel empty. I love my job, meeting fans, making friends, travelling the world. But now I feel tired and have no motivation to do anything.

My alarm rang, waking me up. We have a rehearsal today yet I can't find the energy to get out of bed, my body feels heavy. I sat up, staring at the wall for five minutes before actually getting out of bed and going for a shower.

I turned the water on cold since it usually helps me wake up, but today my body had no reaction to it. I still felt numb.

After I finally managed to have a shower I got changed, putting on some black sweatpants and a oversized T-shirt.

I made my way to the kitchen making myself a coffee. This was my last chance in getting some energy, and I really hope it works. "Hey hyung". I turned around, not knowing who the voice belonged to. " oh hey dino, you alright ".
It's not surprising it was dino, he is usually one of the first ones up for rehearsal.

"Yeah I'm fine, how long is practice today?" That question made me even more tired because the answer to it was tiring. " I think it's six hours today". He just nodded at me before walking off.

Finally my coffee was done, I picked it up and went to sit at the table. I must have spaced out because now everyone was up and doing their own thing and I hadn't even realised. I just want to go back to bed and sleep.

I looked at my watch checking the time and realised we were running late. I don't even know how much time has passed. "Guys hurry up we are late" I yelled to the other members. One by one they came rushing down, and i to the van. I was the last one in, taking my seat next to the window.

I put my headphones in and stared out the window. I wish I could go back to the old me, the me who was always happy, the me who was excited everyday, the me who genuinely loved life. I think we take it for granted the happy times in life and then when it goes away we can't help but feel regretful.

I closed my eyes, letting myself drift off into a light sleep. "-ung hyung" "w-what oh sorry"
"It's okay but we arrived" I looked out the window, being met with the view of the outside of our studio's. " thank you".

I got up, making my way out the van and i to the building. The more time passes the more tired I feel, if that's even possible.  I put my bags down at the side and begin to stretch.

Everyone began having their own conversation but I just didn't have the energy to do that. "Okay guys please get in position" the choreographer shouted. We all listened, doing ad we were told.

It was finally the end of practice. Everybody was tired. We made our way back to the dorm and got a shower. Luckily the shower did make me feel more relaxed and we have a day of tomorrow, which everyone is excited about.

However, right now I didn't want to do anything but sleep. So I went back to bed and closed my eyes. Drifting off to sleep.

I was awoken by someone nudging me, j whined before opening my eyes slightly to see who it was. Turns out it was mingyu.
"What" "oh sorry, tea is ready come down and eat" I sat up before replying "I'm not hungry, I'm just gonna rest" he gave me a concerned look before taking a seat on the edge of my bed.

"Are you okay hyung" that question surprised me because honestly, I didn't know if I was okay. "Of course, why wouldn't I be" "well lately you haven't been acting like yourself, you rarely smile and you always look tired". What he was saying was true, but I don't know why it was happening. " I'm just tired okay, I'm fine" he nodded at me before leaving, closing the door on his way out.

I collapsed back in my bed, staring up at the ceiling. I didn't want to feel like this anymore, I wanted to be happy. A tear slipped from eyes, rolling down my cheek. All my emotions just hitting me suddenly. I started crying even more, sobbing until there was no tears left.

I began to feel tired again, closing my eyes and wanting the pain to go away.

It was the next morning and once again my alarm went off. I rolled over to turn it off, sighing after. I didn't want to wake up early, I didn't want to get out of bed. But I didn't have a choice.

Swinging my legs round I stood up from the bed, showering brushing my teeth, getting ready and sitting down waiting for the others. I felt kinda guilty, I mean I'm probably bringing the others mood down with mine. I'm probably ruining their fun with my full face.

Once again my emotions got the better of me, I didn't even realise I was crying until I felt something wet travelling down my cheek. I wiped it but more eventually started to fall, my cries turning into sobs.

I didn't want to feel like this, I want to go back to normal. I want to be happy, was that too much to ask for?.

I had forgotten where I was. I wasn't in my bedroom, I was in the middle of our dorm. I bearded footsteps approaching, I quickly wiped my tears. "Are you okay, what's wrong" hoshi bent down towards me. "N-nothing I'm fine"
I am so stupid why did I say that " no your not, and that's okay but please don't lie about it" he was right, I'm a liar.

"I'm sorry" was all I managed to say "hey it's okay". I heard hoshi call for the others who one by one, started gathering around. "Oh my god what's happened" I recognised the voice, it was Joshua. "I don't know I just found him crying".

I was pulled into someone's chest, my body relaxing into it. "Hey, honey can you please tell us what's wrong" I knew I couldn't hold off forever. " I-I don't know" I could tell the others were a little confused by that " I just don't feel happy a-anymore, I feel numb". It felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders which felt nice because I didn't even know I was carrying that pressure.

"Aww baby come here" I let them hug me, feeling the comfort. "Why didn't you tell us" " because I'm the oldest, I shouldn't dump all my problems into you". More tears were leaving my eyes. "Look, honey you are never ever bothering us okay, it's hurts us to see you suffering". I nodded at them, beginning to feel a little better with all the support. They hugged me again, rubbing my back.

"I'll call the manager and let him know we need a few days off". I knew it was pointless arguing with him about that one, and to be honest I really need those few days off.

"Come in let's go watch a movie, all of us".

That night I wasn't completely better, but I definitely felt supported. I felt lucky to have those guys as my friends. I know it will take
Time to get to get back to my old self, but this was a start.